Monday, August 24, 2015

Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Seasons #3 - Summer

Ricky the Kangaroo may have dumped our hero, but now Link has found Dimitri the Dodongo. Who knew that a day would come when man and Dodongo could exist in harmony?

Saturday, August 22, 2015

Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Seasons #2 - Spring

Previously on Oracle of Seasons, former Vermont governor Howard Dean cut a battle rap on the Dungeon 1 boss, shaming him offstage with tales of his time in Cranbrook (that's a private school!)

Now, Link takes a moment to talk to...a guy in sunglasses? Did I step into Earthbound?

Thursday, August 20, 2015

Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Seasons (Game Boy Color, 2001)

Here we go, the other half of the Oracle equation. Ages had to do with the flow of time, while this one has to do with the passing of seasons. Which is also time. Er...

Well, point is, while Ages had you bouncing between past and present, this one has you bouncing between the four seasons (in the present, I guess) to affect your surroundings. So basically, Link can control the weather. Which would be really cool in real life, especially when we just had the hottest month in Earth's history.

While Ages is very difficult and puzzle-heavy, this one is on the easier side and combat-centric. I vastly prefer this game. Seriously, Ages was hard to enjoy. Onward and upward though.

Tuesday, August 18, 2015

Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Ages Finale - Age of the Fall

Previously on Oracle of Ages... Queen Ambi became Locutus of the Borg. Now, Link must face the horror that is Dungeon 7, along with whatever not-as-bad stuff happens after that.

Sunday, August 16, 2015

Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Ages #4 - Oracle Fixation


I apologize in advance for how not up to par this will be. I played this a while ago and it's tough to remember all the details. Let's get to it.

Thursday, August 13, 2015

Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Ages #3 - Dodongo Dislikes Dean

As far as I can tell, most people played Seasons first. I should have started with that one myself because it's a lot easier than this brutal game. Ah well. ProTip: Play Seasons first.

Moonlit Grotto: A terrific place to bring a date...that you're trying to kill for some reason.

Sunday, August 9, 2015

Final Fantasy XV: Episode Duscae

 Got ahold of a demo code, very unexpectedly, for the latest Final Fantasy. I'M EXCITED. No idea what to expect (except that the four heroes are douchebags), so let's jump into this.

Thursday, August 6, 2015

Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Ages #2 - Teaching Mr. Tingle

Today in Oracle of Ages: The psycho-sexual thriller of the year. Starring Natalie Portman, Tingle, and Tingle's tiny green penis. Oh yeah.

Monday, August 3, 2015

Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Ages (Game Boy Color, 2001)

This game is really something else. It actually surpasses Link's Awakening in a lot of ways and never ceases to be thrilling. That said, it's extremely difficult. I'd go so far as to call it the hardest game in the entire Zelda series. It's difficult and puzzle-centric, while the twin game, Oracle of Seasons, is easier and action-centric. That right there might tell you all you need to know about which of these games is for you. ProTip: Finishing one of the two gives you a password that you can use to start the other game at like a third of max health. If you're planning to play both, I highly advise playing Seasons first so you can take the power boost into the more difficult Ages.