Gremlins 2: The New Batch (Game Boy, 1990)

 

The last game from the Game Boy Player's Guide that I had on my list of things to check out (where it has been for, no joke, 30 years). Always kinda knew this would be the last thing I played from the guide, for whatever reason. I've got kind of an unusual link with this one, which I'll get into in a moment here. Also this is THE WORST GODDAMN GAME EVER.

R-Type III: The Third Lightning (Super NES, 1994)

 

This was the first really difficult game that I ever beat. They totally cranked that difficulty meter from the previous games and made this an ahead-of-its-time murderfest akin to Super Meat Boy. The good news is that rather than repeating the levels on death like all previous games in the series, this one gives you actual checkpoints and lots of them. Also infinite lives. So the incredibly tough levels can be tackled one segment at a time. There are no difficulty levels, but the difficulty is just right, and they pretty much got it perfect here. Though be prepared that this game does take a while to get through if played fully legit, and every stage is a fierce battle.

Super R-Type (Super NES, 1991)

Time for one of my favorite SNES shooters. This is basically R-Type II remixed for the new SNES, with some R-Type content thrown in, and a couple entirely new levels. I got this game as a kid, one of the 10-15 games I got in the 1990's, and really liked it because I kinda had to. It was all I had to play for a few weeks there! It's a good game regardless, and certainly easier on the eyes than the Game Boy ones (which admittedly punch above their weight). Since we hadn't gotten R-Type II in the states at the time, this game seemed almost entirely new. Still no build variety though.

(Originally posted in 2014, rewriting some of it now to go with the others)

R-Type II (Game Boy, 1992)

 

This one I played way later in time than the other one, and for a while didn't even know it existed. The first one was the only one I saw covered or talked about anywhere. And there's a very good reason for this: It never came out in North America. That's right, it got Japan and Europe releases and then they just kinda cancelled the American version. Regardless, this is basically part two of the first game, picking up right where it left off. It has a lot in common with Super R-Type (but not everything). I think most people only experienced this via the R-Type DX compilation on Game Boy Color, especially in the States.

R-Type (Game Boy, 1991)

 

Another Game Boy Player's Guide game, and one I'm surprised I never posted about already. I actually got this game as a kid, one of the ten or so Game Boy games I ever owned. Unfortunately, out of those ten-ish, this was probably the one I got the least out of. I think I played it a grand total of maybe 2-3 hours at the most, and was pretty much done with it in one day. It's a very short game and doesn't pose any particular challenge, especially compared to other games in this series. Still, it's worth a look.

The R-Type series, from Irem, was sorta the Ross Perot of the shooter universe circa the 1990s. Not as popular or well-known as Gradius and not as beloved by the hardcore as the vertical Compile games. It has a number of innovations that set it apart from (and even surpass at times) the Gradius games.

Ranking the Dark Souls 3 Areas From Worst To Best

 

Dark Souls 3 is certainly the most refined of the trilogy (quadrilogy, if you count Demon's Souls). I found that it was lacking a little bit of the grittiness and mystique of the earlier games in the series, but so goes the price of progress.

Ranking the Sekiro Areas From Worst To Best

 

Not a Soulsborne game but I absolutely consider Sekiro to be one of Fromsoft's "big seven" and a part of the overall series. It plays very differently from the rest, though, and is considerably more challenging than any of them. At least until you realize the game doesn't really penalize you much for spamming block. In any case, this game is tremendous and I had a huge amount of fun with it. While ER is their best game overall and Bloodborne is pound-for-pound the most interesting, Sekiro might be the most fun out of all of them. No character-creation in this one, but it allows the game to do a lot more with the emotions of the main character. No build variety either, which allows the game to have really focused gameplay that is centered more on mastery than finding a meta.

Ranking the Bloodborne Areas From Worst To Best

 

Good to finally get some Bloodborne content on here that isn't me hating on the game. While Elden Ring is Fromsoft's magnum opus, Bloodborne might be pound for pound their most interesting game. It's the only other one that sometimes challenges ER's supremacy for me, depending on the phase of the moon when you ask.

Ranking the Dark Souls 2 Areas From Worst To Best

A game with very low lows and very high highs. The dynamic range for zones in this game is a lot more variable than the rest of the series. I'm one of the few people who likes this more than Dark Souls, and I find it much more polished and streamlined. Well, for the most part. the Adaptability/Agility stat was unnecessary (and never appeared in any other From game) and the rolling wasn't nearly as good as the other games - which probably accounts for the vast majority of people's gripes about this game. Level Adaptability to 30ish to get Agility to 105ish and your rolls are basically as good as the rest of the series, which, essentially, "fixes" this game. It's kinda like triggering all of Alia's speeches and then backup-saving so you can play Mega Man X5 normally after that. Regardless, on with the list.

Ranking the Dark Souls Areas From Worst To Best

 

The second game in the series, but as of right now the "oldest" if that makes any sense. It's the only one that doesn't look amazing. Though maybe its muddy grittiness is a plus, I'm not sure. Despite having masterclass-level stage design, this has slowly become my least-favorite of Fromsoft's big seven soulsbornekiros. Not as pretty as all of the others, more rudimentary, and just kinda dark and unforgiving. Which, for some, makes it perfect. After the more normal level and level select format of Demon's Souls, this game's world layout is pretty much the next evolution of the Metroid formula and would define their games from here on out.

Ranking the Demon's Souls Areas From Worst To Best

Time for some Fromsoft content. They're my favorite game devs and make my favorite games, and I've barely mentioned them on here except to not like Bloodborne before I understood what it was (a mistake previously made with FFVI in 1995 and Xenogears in 1999). I think I later revised that, at least. Doing several of these lists, now that I've played most of these games several times over.

The 1000 Games I've Beaten (#474 - 500)

 

#474 Contra (NES) – Fall 2013

Got to the rest of THIS series a good decade and a half after I should have (much like the Castlevania series). This is pretty much the quintessential NES action game. No bullshit, just cool weapons and nonstop battles. It also draws heavy inspiration from Alien and Aliens, which begs the question of why that series never got any games based on it that were just THIS. Nope, they always had to get cute and mess it up. Well, this game gives you the blueprint on how to make a good game, all they had to do was follow it. The only real downside is that it's a very difficult game. The thirty lives code helps a lot and I only play it with that.

Battle Unit Zeoth (Game Boy, 1991)

 

One of the many games I wanted as a kid and didn't get. And also one of the many games that I'm kinda lucky I didn't get because it isn't anywhere near as good as I thought it was. It's a fairly basic action game, nothing great, nothing bad either, but it can be finished fairly easily in about 30 minutes at the most. The same could be said for Kirby's Dream Land, but as a first game launching pad it does what it does very well. After that I wanted things that had a bit more longevity, given that I'd only get a game every couple months. This one wouldn't have fit the bill at all, and it has the illusion of complexity that isn't there. At least it has a mech in it, that's pretty cool.

The 1000 Games I've Beaten (#453 - 473)

#453 Bioshock Infinite (Playstation 3) – Summer 2013

One of those games that I thought was a masterclass the first time I played it, only to find all kinds of flaws with it on subsequent runs. Nowhere near as deep as the previous two games. Basically plays like a Call of Duty, with the main "attack spell" functioning just like a grenade. Doesn't have the variety or the interesting spells of the previous games. Gets rid of traps and the weapon wheel in favor of "loadouts" where you can only carry two weapons at a time. There are more weapons, but even then they're heavily redundant (aka a bunch of them will do the same thing). The gameplay is lacking on this one and it's carried by the story and setting.

I really did love it the first time through though. It has some heart and soul, and it was probably the first real "multiverse" story I saw in a game/movie, or at least the first interesting one. This was before multiverse stuff was completely overdone in pop culture. However I'd take the first or even the second game over this one any day on gameplay and storytelling. Main thing going against this is that it's in the same series as an all-timer like Bioshock and if it were its own standalone game I wouldn't judge it as harshly.

The 1000 Games I've Beaten (#432 - 452)

#432 Mario Bros (Arcade) – Winter 2013

The start of the Three-Decade Project. Got this idea to play something from every year of the previous 30 years, which got me a bunch of new #'s. First was 1983. This game...did not take long at all. Probably like a half hour? It's a very basic arcade game with one screen.

The Top Twenty Classic Final Boss Themes in Gaming

Today I'm listing what I consider to be the twenty best final boss themes in the lexicon of classic gaming. There are many final boss themes that I've never heard, so your mileage may vary. RPGs will be over-represented, as most of the great epic final battle scores that come to mind are from those very games.

(Originally posted many years ago as a top 17. Now with several more added and all of the broken music links fixed)

Mario Kart 7 (Nintendo 3DS, 2011)

 

I mentioned playing this back to back with the DS one in 2015 or so. Well, let's see if I form any new opinions playing them back to back for a second time. Originally I liked this one a lot more, but ever since I've heard about how great the DS one is.

Fun Fact: This was the first 3DS game I ever bought/played/finished, which shows how much I like this series.

Mario Kart DS (Nintendo DS, 2005)

 

Back in the day I did most of the Mario Kart series, but couldn't get a couple of the portable ones. That's no longer the case. Doing something a bit different and giving a rundown of every course here. I was never crazy about this game back when I first played it, probably because the DS in general was a system I wasn't crazy about. Also, Mario Kart 7 on 3DS was already out, so I was just playing this for completion's sake before the new one. It was just an appetizer! Yet ever since then I've heard that it's better than its 3DS counterpart. Heck, I've heard that this is one of the best games in the series, so we'll see if I have a higher opinion of it this time.

The 1000 Games I've Beaten (#411 - 431)

#411 Batman: Arkham City (Playstation 3) – Summer 2012

This is the point where my game-finishing took off because I decided to go for 1000. Played more short games from this point forward to get that number up. So the finish-rate basically doubles for the rest.

Castlevania - Harmony of Dissonance (Game Boy Advance, 2002)

 

Second of the GBA trilogy and generally agreed upon to be the weakest of the Big Six portable 'Vanias from this era. They're all good, but this one is a step down. At least it's canon, unlike Circle of the Moon. They also brightened this one up to the point of being neon since CotM was so difficult to see on GBA hardware. It's basically the flipside of CotM in pretty much every regard. You can also tell from the main character design that they were really trying to emulate Symphony of the Night. It also marks Koji Igarashi returning to directing after skipping CotM.

Castlevania Legends (Game Boy, 1997)

 

A game that Koji Igarashi once referred to as "an embarrassment". Rumor has it that the entire nation of Japan considered issuing an apology for this game, citing it as "the worst thing our country has ever done". China was outraged so Japan had to walk back that idea. I don't know, I think Koji was being a little unfair on this poor game.

So, is it really that not-good? ........Yes. However it's better than Castlevania Adventure and even though that's a low bar, it's a bar that this game safely hurdles over. Not sure why there was such a step down from Belmont's Revenge to this, though. The main sin of this game is that it tries to completely re-write the Belmont canon to make Alucard the father of the entire line, just because they wanted him and Sonia to be love interests. Which means, by extension, that they're all descended from Dracula. Alrighty then.

Castlevania II: Belmont's Revenge (Game Boy, 1991)

 

This game is so much better than the previous one that it's mind-boggling. If I'd gotten this as a kid, I'd have had a total ball with it and would probably have it up there with stuff like Metroid II now. I know we were all hoping for Belmont Pachinko for the next game, but this'll have to do.

Castlevania Adventure (Game Boy, 1989)

 

The next Castlevania I wanted to cover...also happens to be the next Game Boy Player's Guide game, so I can take out two things with one stone. Unfortunately this one is broadly considered to be the worst game in the series, at least out of the 2D games.

There are 10 more Castlevania games I want to check out. I've gotta save some for Halloween of course but I'm doing a few before that because it's always a good time for Castlevania.

The 1000 Games I've Beaten (#395 - 410)

#395 Catherine (Playstation 3) – Winter 2012

A game about women...and pushing crates around. It's kind of fitting that this is what I was playing when I started dating my longest-term girlfriend. Fitting because she is best known for pushing giant crates around. Wait a minute, is this game a metaphor for helping women move into a new place?

Mortal Kombat Master Post

 

Here are all the MK links in one place and a tier list now that I finished the series. What a completely bonkers series.

Mortal Kombat 1 - Act Three

May is gonna be the "finish unfinished things up" month. Have a number of things to wrap up, starting with MK.

Mortal Kombat 1 - Act Two

I need to note that while this may not be the best version of Shang Tsung (that would be the movie / MK11 one), it's a REALLY GOOD version of the character. Whoever it was who played/voiced him in this game completely nailed the performance. He's diabolical, smarmy, and pretty much a perfect villain.

Mortal Kombat 1 (Playstation 5, 2023) - Act One

 

IT'S MORTAL

F*****IN'

MONDAY!

The 1000 Games I've Beaten (#374 - 394)

 

#374 Halo 2 (Xbox) – Summer 2011

Co-opted this with the same roommate I played the first one with. Was a fantastic time. Probably have the fondest memories of this game out of the whole series because of the two-player, though Halo Reach certainly had the best story. We played this over a bunch of afternoon sessions and it's a good memory.

Favorite Weapon: I think it was like a dual-wield submachine gun setup that was new in this game, that's what I mainly remember wielding.

Castle of the Winds Part II - Lifthransir's Bane (PC, 1993)

 

Part Two (AKA the rest of the game) was the one you had to buy after finishing the shareware demo. However, in the late 1990's Rick Saada made this freeware as well, so anyone could play it. Wish I'd known about this at the time, because I'm sure I would have liked to revisit the game back then. This part has the third and final dungeon of the game, which is bigger than the other two combined and transpires over a whopping 25 floors as our hero fights down through the Castle of Winds to face Surtur.

Castle of the Winds Part I - A Question of Vengeance (PC, 1993)

 

Today I'm looking at a Windows 3.1 turn-based RPG from 1993 that was developed by one guy, the mighty Rick Saada. This is a relic from back when one person could make a game. It doesn't have any music and the visuals are as barebones as it got in the 1990's, but By God it's compulsively fun and heavily D&D inspired.

This might be the game that got me into RPGs. I never finished it, because it's a two-part game and only the first part is shareware. It's like the first third of the overall game. No idea where I got it back then, but I had it on disc circa mid-1994 or so. I don't think I ever beat the "game" (or rather, demo), but I did get to the boss, the Hill Giant. At that point in time I'd tried (and failed) to get anywhere with rentals of Secret of Mana and 7th Saga, but I fared a lot better with this game for whatever reason.

Between this, Lord of the Rings, and D&D I developed a pretty strong interest in RPGs, stats, monsters, fantasy in general. This game may well have led the pack though. And now, with the magic of Windows 3.1 emulation, I get to take another look at it...and maybe finally get to Part Two, which is now freeware. I'll talk more about the game's history in that part, this one is all about the gameplay.

The 1000 Games I've Beaten (#355 - 373)

#355 Castlevania (NES) – Fall 2010

2010's Halloween festivities included a post series on the 'Vanias, which I'd never played before this aside from Super Castlevania IV in 1998. It's now one of my favorite game series in existence, but back in 2010 I don't know if I really "got it". The posts basically just made fun of the games and got a negative reception in the comments, so later I replayed the series and did the posts over again with a bit more respect.

The 1000 Games I've Beaten (#337 - 354)

 #337 Lufia: The Legend Returns (Game Boy Color) – Spring 2010

Kind of a mediocre GBC game, but it works well and it has its moments. I wish we could have seen what the original planned "Lufia 3: Ruins Chasers" game on Playstation would have looked like, instead. I spent a lot of time level-grinding in this game and farming bombs to use against the optional superbosses, which are both early in the game fights with Gades. Most of what I remember about the game is that particular struggle, not so much anything after that. I made sure to beat both of the Gades-es. Spent more time working on the optional Gades Quest than I did on the actual rest of the game.

Rockman 2: The Power Fighters (Arcade, 1996)

 

A year later, the sequel to the previous game! Again, arcade-only at the time, confusing title. While the first was just kinda an arcade fighting-hybrid based on the first seven games, this one is more of a promotional vehicle for the upcoming Mega Man 8. They reuse almost everything from the first game so it's more of an expansion than anything else. I just played both of them and can barely tell them apart.

Rockman: The Power Battle (Arcade, 1995)

 

One of the two Mega Man arcade games that Japan got in the mid-90's. Eventually it made it to the US via being included as a bonus in the Mega Man Anniversary Collection for PS2-era systems. I'm playing it on the modern Capcom Arcade Stadium (it's on the second one). Was surprised to realize I never covered these on here, given that I did most of the Mega Man series. It's basically an "Oops, all boss fights" version of Mega Man.

Editor's Note: Being told that this actually DID get a release in American arcades, so correction on that.

The 1000 Games I've Beaten (#324 - 336)

#324 Shadow of the Colossus (Playstation 2) – Winter 2010

Being largely shut-in during a brutal winter, I wanted to catch up a bit with the PS2 generation, which I'd missed a lot of. A big part of that was this game, which was hands-down the prettiest PS2 game I ever played. It looks more like a PS2.5 game, almost closer to the PS3 than the PS2 visually. More importantly, this is a game with a ton of heart and soul, and that shines through on a constant basis. Just an amazing game to see in action, even at this point with the PS3 around.

True Lies (Super NES, 1995)

 

This is the one game I bought in the 1990's that I didn't actually finish, as far as I know. Well, more specifically my mom bought it. We went to the store to get something new and she got me this and Stargate. We liked both movies, and didn't know how bad movie-licensed games were yet. The good news is that both of said games are actually pretty decent. Yeah, even this one.

LJN finally made something good? Yeah, I'm surprised too. These two games are probably the closest I ever got to actually buying a bad game, but I lucked out. I'll cover Stargate some time, but in the meantime I think this is the superior game of the two. Surprised that I never finished it until 2010. I did skip to the last level in 1995 and "beat" the game with an invincibility code, but it wasn't until 2010 that I actually painstakingly beat every level normally (with emulator checkpoints, as some of these levels are way too long).

The 1000 Games I've Beaten (#314 - 323)

#314 Bebe's Kids (Super NES) – Fall 2009

"Hey Yo! Bebe's Keeeeds!"

The iconic title screen theme that heralds the arrival of one of the greatest video games of the 16-bit era. In this game you choose between a crippled spastic boy and a slightly-less crippled spastic girl and battle the forces of an evil robot in an amusement park.

The 1000 Games I've Beaten (#299 - 313)

 

#299 Persona 3 (Playstation 2) – Winter 2009

This was an interesting, challenging game that was unlike anything else at the time. I'm not really into Japanese High School Simulators and there are about 1200 of them, but I really liked the mysticism and occult they worked into this game. The battle system heavily emphasizing elemental weaknesses was a lot of fun and the whole thing just felt very unique. Mostly enjoyed the dungeon crawling and battles, plus the Persona fusing to see what'd happen.

Ranking the Lord of the Rings Vol. 1 (SNES) Fellowship From Best To Worst

 

Today on this most auspicious of days, it's time to rank the characters of LOTR Vol. 1, one of the top classics from Mandingo Interactive.

Ninja Gaiden Shadow (Game Boy, 1991)

 

Never covered a Ninja Gaiden game before. The NES trilogy is known for having these interesting, complex plots and cutting-edge cutscenes between levels. Well, don't expect that here. This was made by an entirely different design team and doesn't have much of anything for cutscenes or story. If you're lucky you might get a "Ryu's dad was researching spiders in the amazon right before he died".

The Hunt for Red October (Game Boy, 1991)

 

Another game from the Game Boy Player's Guide. This one has Sean Connery! ...on the box!

DuckTales (Game Boy, 1990)

 

Another classic from the Game Boy Player's Guide that I wanted to check out for a long time. The six-game Capcom/Disney series on NES was pretty awesome and something I'd really like to do more with. This, however, is probably the only Game Boy port I'll play from that set, due to it being in the guide and me trying to check out everything from it. Duck Tales! Woo-ooh!

The 1000 Games I've Beaten (#284 - 298)

#284 Final Fantasy IV Advance (Game Boy Advance) – Winter 2008

2008 was a bit of a new beginning. Went to college on a part time basis, was doing better in general than the previous couple years, and had most of my backlog obliterated from the 2007 finishing-fest. Probably the last time I was ever "caught-up" on games (except the Zelda Crusade, of course). Played a lot of new stuff in 2008. Today we've got the entirety of 2008 in one post.

Ranking the 80's and 90's RPGs I've Finished

Pre-millennium was the golden age for gaming in a lot of ways, especially when it came to traditional RPGs. This list is kind of a supplement to the big 1000 list, just a fun thing for me to think about while I do that.

Note: Counting 2000. One can technically say 2000 was the end of the decade, and either way I feel like the real changeover from retro to modern happened in 2001 with the advent of the PS2/XBox generation. So Dragon Quest VII just barely gets spared from being on the list and probably scoring pretty low on it.

If something I played is a recent remaster/port and very close to the original, it counts as me playing the original for ranking purposes. Like the Langrisser games, or Romancing SaGa 2. If it's a full-on remake it doesn't count, like the completely-overhauled PSP remake of Ys 3 doesn't count as me playing OG Ys 3.

The 1000 Games I've Beaten (#268 - 283)

 

#268 Darkstalkers 3 (Playstation) – Summer 2007

A game (and EGM ad) that helped a lot of us go through puberty. For my money this is probably the sexiest game ad and cover of all time. Ten years or so after I first saw the game, I finally got ahold of it and played through it. It's a fighting game, it's over fairly quick, and it's just kinda there. But I sure do like the artwork.

Character of Choice: Morrigan, of course. Duh.

Shadow of the Ninja (NES, 1990)

 

One of the trio of games I got to play (some of) the first time I ever saw an NES. Which makes this...possibly the first NES game I ever played. It was either this, Super Mario Bros, or Destiny of an Emperor. Then in 2007 I actually played through it. It's been ages, so it's high time I took a gander at it. Going to see if it brings back any memories of that first time holding an NES controller. I bet this WAS the first one I played, because it had "ninja" in the title and I was like 7. Definitely would have reached for this first out of the three games. Also it's from Natsume, so that's pretty cool. Without further ado...

Shatterhand (NES, 1991)

 

It's time for the baddest game on the NES: Mutha-fuckin' Shatterhand! This is one of the most underrated games on the system. In it, you play as a Not-Terminator and punch your way through a bunch of platforming levels. Why is it called that? Apparently the guy's name is Shatterhand, which is a crazy coincidence considering he grew up to have a metal hand. I hope that's his last name at least. First name is probably something like Dave. This guy is so metal, he punches out his own God Damn logo! Brought to you by Jaleco!

The 1000 Games I've Beaten (#256 - 267)

 

#256 Mega Man Zero (Game Boy Advance) – Winter 2007

An interesting and respectable spinoff series begins here. Having Zero be the main character of a series was a no-brainer, and controlling him is nearly as fun as it is in the X series. I say nearly because the game's a little slower than the PS1 X games, and I'm not crazy about Zero's redesign. Yeah, I know there's a story reason for it, and also the story reason kinda sucks. If they'd just gone with the existing Zero design and moveset for this, the series would have been better off for it, so there was no good reason to change it up. The guy you play as is barely even recognizable as Zero.

Mortal Kombat 11: Aftermath DLC (Playstation 4, 2020)

 

This story-based DLC is several hours long and basically a completely new game. Ultimate MK11 if you will. It bridges the gap between MK11 and MK1. But really it might as well be MK12. Which makes MK1... MK13. Also it brings back Cary Hiroyuki-Tagawa to play Shang Tsung for one night only, as he reverts to his old form to try and usurp Kronika. Guy is making a legitimate claim to being the series' main villain, regardless of his boss' superior strength.