Final Fantasy Tactics: The War of the Lions (Playstation, 1998 / PSP, 2007)

 This is one of my favorite games of all time. I played it in early 1998 on the original Playstation, and it was a magical gaming experience. The great soundtrack and the unparalleled atmosphere gave it an edge over other strategy RPGs, while the gameplay and class/ability system were super-compelling and fun. Best of all, it doesn't have that stupid Judge system from Final Fantasy Tactics Advance. If you've only played those games, do yourself a favor and check out the original. This one...is where it's at.

It got a PSP remake in 2007, and that's what I'm covering here. With a redone translation and some new additions like cutscenes and optional endgame stuff, this might be my favorite version of the game.

Originally posted March 2016, now remastered for 2025

Mega Man ZX: Advent (Nintendo DS, 2007)

 

The last ZX game is a little bit divisive. Some people like it, some don't like it at all. I think it's a step up from the previous game just because you don't get lost nearly as much. However, there are some big downgrades here. The voice acting is horrendous and the transformations / special weapons tend to not be as good as the previous game.

Regardless, for the Eleventh (My God) Day of Christmas I took a stab at it for the second time ever, let's go.

Alien Vs. Predator: Requiem (2007)

It's "slam-bang horror action"!

Contra 4 (Nintendo DS, 2007)

Old-school Contra games made a big return in 2007 with Contra 4 for the Nintendo DS. This is a direct sequel to the awesome Contra III: The Alien Wars.

Game Review: Fl0w (Playstation 3, 2007)

Publisher: Sony Computer Entertainment

Developer: thatgamecompany

Time to Complete: 1-2 hours

Thatgamecompany, future makers of Flower and Journey, got their mainstream start with the relatively unassuming Fl0w. It started as a moderately popular flash game before being ported to the PS3 with HD graphics. Riding a wave of momentum, it became the most downloaded PSN game of 2007.

I didn't play this game until well after the spiritual sequel, Flower. That game blew me away. I was so impressed with it that I had to go back and experience the game that it originated from. I wasn't disappointed. I do wonder why it has a zero in the title instead of an o, and the game isn't without problems. It's still pretty rad, though.

Warriors Orochi (Playstation 2, 2007)

Finding a good game to play for 2007 was tough. Really tough. My first thought was Bioshock, which I've already played, 100%'d, and don't really have any reason to play again. Once I decided to go for something else, I looked to Super Paper Mario... but it isn't great and I have no real desire to play through all of it. Aside from that, I discovered that my choices were nearly nonexistent when it comes to good games, as 2007's short-enough-to-play games ranged from Petz Catz to Petz Babyz. Why do all of these titles end with a z? Just when I was about to give in and fire up Teletubbiez Extreme, I noticed a game at the end of the release list for the year that piqued my interest. This is Warriors Orochi, which combines Dynasty Warriors and Samurai Warriors in a Marvel Team-Up for the ages. Yeah it makes no sense, but they do blend well and it's way cooler than Alien Vs Predator. Void where prohibited.

Game Review: Bioshock

Bioshock

"Fallen, fallen is Babylon"


Playstation 3 / XBox 360 / Pretty Much Every Computer Format, 2007

Publisher: 2K Games

Developer: Irrational Games

Time to Complete: 15-20 Hours

Some time soon, I'm going to get around to playing and reviewing Bioshock 2. Because of this, I thought it was a good time to review the first game, which I played not once, but twice over the past two years. I'm going to go right ahead and say it: Bioshock might be the best game of the past decade. Maybe. It's definitely on the shortlist, and I'm sure there are plenty of people out there who would give it that distinction. I'd give it Top 5 status for sure. It's so good that it's available on every major HD gaming platform possible, including the PS3, XBox 360, and -  as dweebs, geeks, nerds, and dorks of all stripes already know - computers.

What is Bioshock? A great first person shooter. Then again, calling it that is like calling Lebron James a "good basketball player". It goes way beyond the expected level of quality. Also, it's so much more than just an FPS. It's one part Resident Evil 4, one part Metroid Prime, one part Blade Runner. Add HD graphics, a heaping plate of modern political philosophy, and an incredibly unique setting, and you get Bioshock. Speaking of unique, somehow this game manages to be both futuristic AND retro with the location and storytelling. It flat-out makes me proud of the people who made it. The only way Bioshock could be better is if the whole game were Tina Fey wearing a burlesque outfit and playing an accordion while sitting atop the luckiest piano ever.

Game Review: Odin Sphere

Odin Sphere

Because Odin's Ball just wouldn't sound right


Playstation 2, 2007

Publisher: Atlus

Developer: Vanillaware

Time to Complete: 40-50 hours

Odin Sphere is a cult favorite from the latter days of the Playstation 2's lifespan. 2007 was actually a pretty good year for the PS2, even though the next-gen systems were taking over by then. Why am I reviewing a game that is several years old? Because for some ungodly reason I played it earlier this year, and I need something to show for those efforts besides a debilitating spleen injury.

Highlander: The Source (2007)

Starring Rob Schneider.

Welp... Highlander is one of the cooler franchises of the past 25 years. We've got the iconic original movie. We've got the six-season Highlander: The Series which ended up being one of the cooler TV shows of the 90's... for a long time, it was my favorite show.

Aside from that...there were a bunch more Highlander movies. They run from decent to extremely, extremely awful. It's almost like entirely different people were behind each installment. The movies have little correlation and largely ignore each other. Considering the greatness of the original movie and the series, it makes little sense.

The fifth and final movie, The Source, was the worst, and that's what I'll be looking at today. Why would I write about something that totally put a franchise that I love into the grave? Because I have an idea. I WANTED to like this movie. Really, I wanted to give it a shot. And at first, the movie is pretty cool. So what I'm going to do here is look at the movie right up until it starts to suck. This should be good comic relief, and I need to lighten things up around here after all the serious postings lately.

The moment the movie completely stops being good...this post will self-destruct. Like a light going out. Because that's when this once-great franchise dies.

Let's go.

Game Review: Mega Man ZX Advent

Mega Man ZX Advent

There Is No Dana, Only Zuul


Nintendo DS, 2007

Publisher: Capcom

Developer: Inti Creates

Time to Complete: 3-8 hours

Mega Man ZX Advent is the hottest, sexiest game I've ever played. If this game were any sexier, it would consist entirely of me having a three-way with You and Your Clone. Who? You know who you are. This game is just that sexy. If this game had a human form, I would make love to it, and it would wake up the roommates, the neighbors, and the dead from the nearby Indian Burial Ground with the sheer noisiness. This game knows it, as the Mega Man series continues its dominance of the DS with this sexy-ass game. I legitimately want to spank Mega Man ZX Advent, and spank it good.

Game Review: Metroid Prime Trilogy (Part 3: Metroid Prime 3)

Metroid Prime 3: Corruption

Reinventing the wheel


Wii, 2007 / 2009

Publisher: Nintendo

Developer: Retro Studios

Time to Complete: 9 to 13 hours first go

Note: This review covers the Metroid Prime Trilogy version of the game. Though as far as I can tell, it's the same as the regular version.

Brought to us once again by the sexual dynamos at Retro Studios, Metroid Prime 3 is the culmination of the Metroid Prime saga, as well as the first of the three to begin its existence on the Wii console. Is it any good? Find out inside. There will be both punch and pie. Rated T for Teen.

Game Review: God of War 2

God of War 2

Kratos returns, swinging more pipe than ever

Playstation 2, 2007

Developer: SCE Studios Santa Monica

Publisher: Sony Computer Entertainment

Time to Complete: 8-12 hours

First thing's first: God of War 2 has a very noticeable lack of boobs compared to the first game. However, of the relatively few that it does have, the majority look like God spent an entire week perfecting them. I'm starting to think maybe these games need to more accurately represent the world's boobs with some imperfections. For instance, boobs with cross-eyed nipples.