Thursday, February 24, 2011

Game Review: The Mega Man X Series, Part III


The final three installments in the Mega Man X series are a definite departure from the previous six. They enter the realm of 3D and introduce a number of new characters. After the mess that was Mega Man X6, would the series bounce back with the last few installments? Read on to find out.

Monday, February 14, 2011

The Loin King

This Valentine's Day, I've got something extra special for everyone. Put on some Barry White, because it's time for the story of the greatest lion of all time: The Loin King. Only on the Super NES.

Because someone had to keep all the female lions happy.
And that someone...
...is The Loin King.


Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Secret of Evermore #7 - Metropolis

I used to think the central control area of Evermore was pretty menacing... and then I played Bioshock.

Now that game has a menacing central control area. I don't know if any other game has ever given me such a sense of impending doom.

In other news, now that Hot Dog is a toaster, he doesn't have to worry so much about getting the munchies. After he tokes up, he can just fix himself some toast.

Regardless, PREPARE YOURSELF for the finale of Evermore. Will Hulkster get back to Podunk? Will his dog overdose on pot? Will the final boss be an enormous, wildly vibrating metal penis? There's only one way to find out.



Friday, February 4, 2011

Secret of Evermore #6 - Ascent

The bridge to Ebon Keep has finally been fixed, which eliminates the need to go through the Dark Forest again. This is called "making sure the game has any fans left".
I may have lost Nathan's Hot Dogs sponsorship due to my ties to the Yakuza, and I may no longer be allowed to drink while writing, but this should turn out well.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Secret of Evermore #5 - Ruins


 
This dude gives our hero some advice. Unfortunately, Hulkster is not a rapper, so he is not packing the heat.