Sunday, April 16, 2023

Dragonball Z: Kakarot Part 13 - Bardock: Alone Against Fate


I briefly considered putting DBZ posts up only at 6:00 AM Eastern on Sunday mornings, since back in the 90's that was the only time we could watch it. And we did, too. Staying up on Saturday night wasn't unheard of, and I had some groggy Sundays. Yep, one episode a week (sometimes two) at 6 in the morning. Sounds terrible right? Actually it was awesome. Every episode meant something and we were glued to the TV. It was an EVENT. No show gets me anywhere near that excited as an adult.

Anyway, here's DLC #4.

This one covers the History of Bardock special, which was another DBZ TV special much like the Trunks one. Gokou's father, Bardock, is front and center for this.

Real quick, let's try to extrapolate out what DLC #6 is gonna be. They covered the first two post-DBZ movies and two of the three TV specials. They're gonna cover the final arc of OG Dragonball for #5. What would make sense after all of that? Two things come to mind: The newer Broly movie, and the third TV special (Plot To Destroy The Saiyans). The latter is pretty obscure though, so I'm gonna bet on the Broly movie.

Anyway this one starts with some Freeza Force doctors talking mad shit about 1 year old Gokou. Third-class Saiyans are super weak and everyone takes every damn opportunity to point this out. It's almost as annoying as the way they constantly point out that Gohan has gotten weaker lately in the Buu Saga and Super. Just in case you forgot since the last episode where we reminded you!

Freeza Force Guy 1: "lol, look at how weak this baby is!"

Freeza Force Guy 2: "lol dumb baby"

We join Father of the Year Bardock as he murders everyone on some desert planet so it'll fetch a good price for Freeza. He's like the Department of Defense.

Unfortunately this brings back the Horde Battles from the Res-F DLC with a VENGEANCE. They're bigger and more obnoxious than ever, sometimes throwing as many as 240 enemies at you in a row. Yeah, you roll through them fast, but it's still way too long of a time to be blasting through enemies that pose zero threat whatsoever without getting bored.

Later, back at the Saiyan Bar!

Some 'tude-sporting guys are mocking Bardock and his friends for having such puny THIRD-CLASS power levels. ...this is like all anybody talks about on Planet Vegeta in this game.

Weird thing is, in the game Bardock actually DOESN'T have a puny power level. He's rocking about 10k, making him the third-strongest Saiyan on the planet besides King Vegeta (14k) and Prince Vegeta (11k). So this doesn't really make any sense. His Goon Squad isn't exactly puny either, all hovering between 2k and 3k which is substantially higher than Raditz. One of them is 4.5k. I mean, Bardock is stronger than General Nappa for crying out loud! They took all these power levels from the canon, too.

Well, like I said in the previous posts...don't think about it too much.

And what happened to 2nd Class Saiyans? Do they even exist? We never meet any that I know of. Maybe Paragus (Broly's dad), since he seems to be able to interact with Saiyan elites without actually being one. I'm sure I'll get into this subject more during the upcoming post on the DBS Broly movie. Turliss is probably another one. In any case, it would be pretty funny if there were 3 first-class Saiyans (Nappa being the third), all of one second-class Saiyan, and like 80,000 third-class Saiyans.

Since this game is, at the end of the day, a quest-based RPG... Bardock's first task is to go out and clean up the Saibamen Menace that is menacing the good people of Saiyaville or whatever this place is called. I thought the Saiyans made the Saibamen in a lab or something, I guess they're an indigenous monster from this planet.

That or they WERE made in a lab and went rogue. AUGH! GET IT OFF ME!

After clearing the area, I get a pretty sweet view of Saiyan City. This DLC would have had me doing backflips as a kid. Being able to explore the Saiyan homeworld/lore in an RPG/fighting game? Not sure if this has ever even been possible before.

Nappa still has hair here, cool. Note all of the Freeza Force goons standing at attention and trembling violently as Lord Helmet walks past.

They walk past Bardock, and Vegeta points out the elephant in the room: This rando Saiyan soldier is stronger than almost everyone else on the planet and nobody has noticed.

Bardock meets up with his squad for more pillaging and genocide. At least they have a girl on the squad so people don't think they're sexist or nothin.

The guy in the blue armor is considerably stronger than the others (4.5k, which is nearly Four Raditz) and I think he might be the leader of the group. It's hard to tell if he or Bardock is in charge. If Bardock is in charge, blue armor guy is definitely second.

::checks notes:: Alright, blue guy's name is Tora.

This mission involves genociding peaceful vaguely-Namekian looking people. It's crazy how every planet we go to is guarded by various species that can fly, fire energy blasts, and do martial arts.

After brutally beating down dozens upon dozens of these innocent people, my next task is to...

...knock down all their towers!

"lol at these losers and their low power levels"

"yeah, minding their own business until we came along, what a bunch of do-nothing losers"

Pretty advanced-looking city they've got here. And then I just started blastin!

Eventually the whole place lays in ruins. Hilarious!

Before they leave, a Kanassan seer inflicts Bardock with a curse. Now...he can see the future, including his own unavoidable death. It's a hazy image so far though, just a lot of light and fire.

Elsewhere, Freeza's minions are impressed by how successful these Saiyans have been for them, especially Bardock's team which has a sky-high planet conversion rate. Perhaps they're thinking Bardock might be a little TOO successful...

Planet Meat is next. Yeah!

Look at the backgrounds and you can see other Saiyans taking off on missions. This might even be intended to be Bardock's own crew.

But wait! When Bardock arrives, he quickly realizes that the planet is already toast. Weird, they usually wait for him before they start brutally murdering everyone.

He finds Tora dying nearby. Looks like his friends were ambushed. It's a pretty emotional scene, and...


...I'm sorry. Meatians??

Tora reveals that Freeza stabbed all of them in the back. Even the rather succulent Fasha, seen here getting blasted by that one squid guy from the Freeza Force that doesn't have a name but always seems to be at the forefront of everything.

I guess these Freeza Force randos were above the 4500 needed to beat Tora. Man, power levels are all over the place as needed by the plot.

Finally, Dodoria shows up to finish them off, though his goons had it handled.

Imagine this guy being the last thing you see as you die.

Bardock is so angry that he turns this cloth red from clenching his fist too hard. I think it was a cloth worn by one of his friends.

He then wraps it around his forehead, adopting his iconic look.

Next up is him just absolutely annihilating all of Dodoria's goons with ease. At least, until...

...Dodoria intervenes and blasts him with a big ol' Mouth Beam.

Bardock gets torched so bad that his power drops off the map and they all assume he's dead.

He isn't, though, and makes his way to his feet at the end of the massive trench left by Dodoria's beam.

This DLC makes Dodoria more of a threat than the show ever did, that's for sure.

Next: The thrilling conclusion.

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