Oh man, finally a fun episode after a string of grim ones. Just for that alone this one gets an A.
MACAO - PRESENT DAY
Macao is located in mainland China, but it's very much an island-y place. Right across what appears to be a 30 mile (!!) bridge are Hong Kong and Kowloon. So suffice to say this is a pretty interesting area.
Kit O'Brady is playing Mahjong with a bunch of angry-looking guys.
He explains that Mahjong was actually invented in the U.S. while the guys continue to glare at him. Also they're playing this in the back room of a pasta factory for some reason.
He wins, and is about to leave with his bag of money when MOBSTERS appear.
He gets shot and falls into a putrid garbage dumpster, where this swell guy covers for him so the mobsters run off.
He mainly covered for him so he could nab the giant bag of cash, only to have Kit wake up from being dead and reclaim the money all "thanks bruh"
Next thing we know, he shows up at Duncan's new house, after calling ahead and wanting to stop by. The place is still a dump, and Kit wonders why Duncan doesn't just hire people to do all the work. That's not the point, he got the house specifically to fix it, probably to see if he could.
Flashback time, as we go to a casino in 1988. Some guy is trying to hold up Duncan with...
...damn, is that a Derringer? It's ADORABLE.
Kit, the owner of the casino, "saves Duncan" by beating up the Derringer guy and throwing him out. However, they're both taken completely aback by the arrival of...
...Amanda, who Kit has never seen before. He's enamored with her, as is EVERY OTHER GUY THERE.
She starts talking in a French accent for some reason, which gets Kit even more hot and bothered, and pretends to be a hapless French waif who just arrived here. Duncan is probably wondering what she's up to, as Kit explains that his ownership of the casino is only made possible by his prized loot:
The Double Eagle, his lucky coin that never left his side. He probably shouldn't have told Amanda about this.
Amanda pouts a lot while being bonkers-sexy, as per usual. Back to the present...
Duncan returns to his pad only to sense a disturbance in the force. And of course, it's...
...Amanda, appearing for the first time in Season 4. She just let herself in and took a shower, hope that's okay!
It'd be sweet if she left the door open and Anne ALSO emerged from the shower. "Oh, look who I met on the way over!"
What a hilarious and wacky development! Unfortunately I'm not the head writer of this episode.
Duncan is caught totally off-guard and wonders why she doesn't call first, then shuts up when she starts climbing on him.
A FEW HOURS LATER
Amanda cooked dinner for them and it's bad, really bad. Duncan turns pale and Amanda wonders if she maybe shouldn't cook.
Apparently this was a pasta recipe she learned from the duke of something or other back in the 1800s, who was "a short man with the stamina of a bull"
Great, thanks Amanda, always letting Duncan know about all her conquests. Hilarious.
Duncan heads out to meet up with Kit, who already showed up at the dojo. He wants to see Duncan's apartment, and Duncan thinks that's a bad idea. We quickly find out why: When Duncan mentions that he has a girl upstairs and doesn't want to disturb her, Kit says "I haven't seen you with a girl in a long time...last one was that cheating bitch Amanda who I hate with every fiber of my being"
OH SNAP
Back to the past, "French" Amanda is having a string of huge wins and going "how'd that happen?" like she has no idea what's going on. Also known as the "Emilio Estevez Arcade Tactic" from the Bishop of Battle.
She's gorgeous here, and this should have been the cover art for the episode instead of the similar shot we got that has none of the charisma.
Kit takes her on in a game where the winner's pot keeps getting more and more ridiculous, between her earnings and all the jewelry she keeps throwing in. Kit decides to throw a ton of money onto the pile, while everyone else just kinda nopes out because the stakes are officially ludicrous.
Finally, Kit offers THE DEED TO HIS CASINO and throws that on. I don't know why he'd do something this bone-headed, considering he was winning anyway and about to make a ton of profit (all of Amanda's earnings).
She continues the French floozy charade as some count guy asks how much it'd be worth for her dress to come off and be added to the pile. She says the dress can come off, but not for anything less than a million.
A million dollars in 1888 is equivalent to roughly $30 million in the 2010's.
In any case, she won and she took the casino, completely heartlessly mind you, despite Duncan practically begging her to let Kit keep it.
They sense a disturbance in the force, and Duncan panics.
It's only Richie though.
"IT'S RICHIE! YAY!" says Duncan.
Duncan heads down to the race track at a summons from Kit, who has an offer he can't refuse. He found a perfect racehorse (named Double Eagle, incidentally). It costs $120k but he only has $60k. So he needs Duncan to basically go half-sies on it.
However, he never actually tells Duncan the monetary totals involved here.
Speaking of tapdancing, Amanda thinks Duncan is seeing somebody, and wants to know who. Richie is under strict instructions to not tell Amanda that Duncan went to the racetrack, so he lies about Duncan being at the college.
Amanda doesn't believe him, and she is hot as hell in this episode, I mean, no joke
Amanda is like "You've been working out"
Richie is like "oh God, hlep"
Finally he accidentally says "racetrack, I mean school" in his flusteredness and Amanda has all the info she needed.
She plants a firm one on him anyway JUST CAUSE SHE CAN.
Back in the past, Duncan tries to help matters in some way, but Amanda just blatantly ignores his wishes and refuses to work with Kit in any way. Kit feels like he's lost everything because of her deceptions.
She even renamed the casino to the Queen of Spades. The most Duncan can do is keep them from fighting to the death, because they hate each other so much.
I'm surprised, I figured Duncan could talk her into anything. Turns out, it's the other way around, and once her mind is made up, it's made up.
She has Kit thrown out of the casino, and Duncan is mortified by all of this.
Back in the present, Richie shows up at the racetrack to warn Duncan that he gave up the ghost.
Richie: "She started...doing things. I didn't have a chance, Mac."
Duncan is highly amused by this.
Amanda arrives and wants to know who SHE is. Duncan explains that he was actually just here to buy a horse, and there is no "she" lately.
...a horse FOR HER! That's right, a present.
Amanda has always wanted a horse!
Also Richie did the paperwork with Kit, not realizing that Duncan never actually knew the price of the horse, and thinking that they already discussed all that. So Duncan is now down $60k on a horse that is co-owned by him and Kit, except Amanda thinks it's for her.
What is even happening anymore
Back in the past, our heroes are fooling around.
Amanda: "Oh God, where'd you learn THAT?"
Duncan: "You taught me that, actually"
Good answer and I've given it myself a couple times
They're woken up by terrible news: Someone burned down the Double Eagle Queen of Spades!
They both assume it was Kit who did it to get revenge, and Amanda vows to kill him.
Amanda finds the actual Double Eagle coin in the wreckage and throws it into a nearby storm drain, where it was never seen again.
Damn, Amanda is being kind of horrible in this episode. And hot as hell
Back in the present, they get another visitor at the apartment, and it's...
...Kit. Well, no hiding them from each other now.
They instantly get into it.
Kit: "You FRENCH WHORE!"
Amanda: "I'm not even French!"
Richie thinks all of this is hilarious.
.........
Richie: "I'll show myself out."
Kit, who apparently stole Connor's trench coat, is ready to fight.
So is Amanda. Duncan is having like zero effect on the situation outside of being a physical barrier between them.
Duncan finally gets them to stop by telling them that they're co-owners of the racehorse, and need to at least see if it wins at the race before they fight to the death. They could win a massive amount of money.
Stuff happens, there's a horserace
And Double Eagle wins the day!
They accidentally hug!
...then go back to fighting to the death.
She says she owes him for burning down the casino and Kit says that he had nothing to do with it.
Duncan arrives with a newspaper clipping that proves that Kit was somewhere else at the time of the fire. He also tells them about the massive prize they won, and they finally put aside their differences for the moment.
Back at the pad, they continue to argue about who gets what.
And I'm realizing that Amanda is basically the Ferengi of this series. She's a better-looking Quark.
Finally, Duncan suggests that they do a winner-take-all high card draw and just settle this, then leave each other alone forever.
Kit draws a jack. "It's over Amanda! I have the high ground!"
Amanda draws a card, fusses, and throws it away. Looks like Kit won all the money and the horse. Well, he's gotta get goin' while the gettin' is good.
Funny guy.
Duncan takes a look at her card, and it's a queen. So she pretended she lost. I guess she was getting tired of this beef, and saw an easy way to get out of it.
Duncan is impressed and they make out.
And that's it for this episode. Damn, this was actually a GREAT episode.
Like I went in expecting nothing and I got a fantastic time.
Kit, seen here being not-dead.
I completely forgot to mention, he has a nervous tic where he sneezes every time he senses an immortal. It's hilarious.
I want more episodes like this.
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