Corona Jumper: Final Fantasy VII Remake, Part 9

Tuesday, December 29, 2020

Final Fantasy VII Remake, Part 9 - In Nobody We Trust

Today on FFVII: After a fiery but mostly peaceful plate collapse, our heroes step out into the shattered world. ...there will be punch and pie.

There's a brand new dungeon under the Sector 8 Playground, the place where Cloud and Aerith got to hang out. This dungeon is mostly just hallways full of blastable crates. It's good to see the FFXIII world designer got to do a cameo dungeon.

Barret is crushed by the events of the plate collapse. It just me, or does he really look like Macho Man Randy Savage in a lot of these shots?

They find Wedge (w/ cats) and he's...still alive? That's right, slight change here, as Wedge survived the pillar battle. Cool, I like the guy, glad he's still around. Too bad Jessie didn't survive though.

Note: Why am I cool with Wedge surviving here but not cool with other characters turning out to be fine later? Because this is just a change to the story, not a magical fix. It's fine if they want to change the story and not kill someone off this time. It's very different when you kill people off, then revive them later and go "lol nothing matters". You can't invest in that story. Here, I'm still invested, and interested to see what else is different.

Behold, the Super Shredder form of a Sahagin. "THE DAWN OF THE FISH-MAN IS UPON US" it burps.

In any case, Tifa cuddles a cat while Barret carries Wedge to safety.

He's talking about getting over what happened today, but is that really the most tactful thing to say while you're literally carrying Wedge?

Back at Aerith's house, Cloud hallucinates and sees her in the garden.

...or is it a hallucination? Seems more like an astral projection. Aerith says a bunch of cryptic things, like she knows she isn't long for this world.

Wait, what? How does Aerith know so much? I mean, she doesn't, but her projection acts like she does.

"It's Tuesday, you know what that means."

Cloud actually isn't sure what that means, or what any of this means.

With Aerith in Shinra custody, it's up to the other four heroes to get her out of Shinra Tower. Four, you ask? That's right: Cloud, Tifa, Barret, and Tifa's succulent abs.

Barret bids a tearful farewell to his daughter, and off we go.

Shinra News Network may be mercifully off the air at the moment, but instead we have this Kyrie person barking distorted misinformation at the populace.

This sassy reporter is a gossip-monger and super-sleuth, who has already solved the plate collapse.

...except she's getting all of it wrong too, and Barret is pissed.

There are some popular theories that this hot little number is actually Yuffie in disguise, but said theory makes absolutely no sense when you consider that Kyrie's entire point in this scene is that Wutai is behind the terrorist attack. Which is the exact opposite of what Yuffie would want people to think, given that Wutai is her very-bombable homeland.

Chapter 14 starts now. This is basically the "point of no return" chapter and sets you loose in the world before you head up to Shinra Tower. Any outstanding things that need to get done...need to get done now, pretty much. It also has a TON of sidequests (well, nine) and completionists have to do 'em all. However, if you're rushing to the endgame, this chapter is pretty short. Don't recommend that though, because these sidequests are generally decent and flesh out the world more.

You also get to see Wall Market during the day in this chapter, and it's....weird. Very weird. Everyone is indoors sleeping all day after their nights of debauchery.

BLADE BEAM (limit break 2-1 in the original). It isn't a limit break in this, it's just a regular special attack. So is Braver (1-1). There are only two limit breaks per character in this game, and Cloud's went to Cross-Slash (1-2) and the former Climhazzard (2-2) which is now called Ascension.

One particularly tough sidequest in chapter 14 (maybe the only particularly tough one) has Tifa (w/ succulent abs) doing a pull-up challenge versus Andrea Rhodea (w/ succulent abs). No word on if "The Beautiful People" played during this matchup.

This is just like the Squats Minigame earlier, except it moves a lot quicker. You don't need to win to move on, just do somewhat well. However, winning gets you a trophy, arguably one of the toughest to get in the game.

I'd like to see that in the sequel. There's a lot they can do with this world to say the least. It'll also be great to play an FFVII Remake 2 in a non-COVID world. This one of course got dropped just a couple weeks too late to exist in a regular world.

Our next stop is getting information out of Corneo. Remember when he tried to kill us like, yesterday?

-No

-NO

-Can we not tho?

So yeah, it turns out that the lead Corneo goon, Leslie, actually has a bone to pick with the Don.

He once had a fiancee, you see. They loved each other very much and ::record scratches::

Anyway, back to the main plot. Don Corneo is caught off guard by Leslie's sudden yet inevitable betrayal.

Not TOO off guard though, and he shoots Leslie! Damn.

Corneo explains that the construction of Neo-Midgar is Shinra's master plan. I hope we see that in the sequels too.

Can we just kill this guy already?

But wait! It's giant rat fight, part deux. Corneo escaped, off course.

Dunno what it is about this fight, but I really don't like it, and it doesn't help that you have to do it twice.

Here's the battle with Abzu Mark II. It was a fierce battle, and also marked the moment when I realized I just kinda wanted to get this game over with. That said, I -do- really like this game and I'm glad it exists, even if there are things about it that aren't optimal.

Leslie is okay, so that's cool. He bids our heroes goodbye for now.

Looks like we've gotta climb this wall and then climb a mountain of debris to get to Shinra Tower. It's very different from the original "shiny wire of hope" scene.

Another sidequest unlocks what is essentially fast travel, as you can warp between several chocobos that are parked around the slums.

These sidequests are driving me crazy at this point.

Boco: "COOO COOOO"

Check out this fast-travel system. I look forward to having something like this in the greater FFVII world, not just this one slum. Ah hell, I guess I'm stoked for Part Two already, even as I want to wrap this one up.

Note: I absolutely love the way the screen goes to greyscale and slow-mo when entering commands. It makes everything feel exponentially more dramatic, and sometimes it makes for some gorgeous visual shots.

...Uhhh.

Kyrie: "Look at my butt!"

Kyrie does more evasive shit-talking to our heroes as they ask why she lied about Wutai.

Anyway, this leads to another sidequest. Still have no idea who this lady is, but I really don't think she's Yuffie. Looking forward to Yuffie, though. If the women in this episode are any indication, she'll be cute too. And in the year 2020 when not many people are going outside, cute game ladies are more than welcome.

Her sidequest sends us to the arena to fight on her behalf. After knocking out some quick battles...

...she has a good stretch about it. Excuse me, I need to get going.

There's another quest involving the Guardian Angel of the Slums. Here she is, fresh out of a Bernie Sanders grassroots canvassing meeting.

Her quest involves stealing from the rich and giving to the poor (that's right). Which means I FINALLY get to see what's behind those locked gates out in the junkyard.

And it's....a lot of junk, really. Also a couple of good items.

This is the big prize. As far as accessories go, it's a great one for a spellcaster, but it's outclassed by other accessories even now. When you only have four characters, it isn't like you have a dire need for extra accessories. A couple of really good ones cover the entire party.

Johnny is thinking about leaving town. He tries to get Tifa to beg him to stay for her...

...and she no-sells it. Sorry, bro.

And that pretty much wraps up all of the optional Chapter 14 stuff.

There's one final optional thing to do before Shinra Tower: Fight Leviathan. This is another Chadley VR fight, and like Shiva it can be pretty tough when you first get access to it.

Here's the actual fight, and it was a hell of a battle. This gets me the Leviathan summon. There's one left (Bahamut, of course) and like the others, it too is optional. You can easily beat the game without getting that one since Bahamut is close to endgame strength. I'll get it later, for sure.

Leviathan gets added to the summon horde. This one is a huge water-element attack, which isn't as useful as it should be because like no bosses in this game have a water weakness. It's also notable that the game doesn't have Titan or a thunder-element summon. Usually they'd be before Leviathan.