Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Highlander: The Series 2x22 - Counterfeit, Pt 2

Now for the meat of the finale. Will Duncan fall prey to Evil Tessa's vile machinations?

Richie attends the funeral of his Bro. It takes place at the foggest cemetary ever. I think they wheeled in one of those smoke machines from an old WCW Monday Nitro.

Meanwhile, elsewhere in the same cemetary, Duncan pays his own respects.

 Duncan is having a quiet moment when...

...he thinks he sees Tessa off in the mist. Let her go, Duncan! Let her go!

Our heroes have a congregation. The full RPG party for the rest of the series has more or less taken shape at this point, though Methos isn't around yet.

Meanwhile, Evil Tessa (who smokes, unlike Tessa Prime) is hanging out with Horton and Clint Eastwood as they look on creepily.

Duncan sees Faux Tessa again later in the day and saves her from being hit by a car. Well, he yelled at her which caused her to be distracted and walk into traffic...or something. These are very elaborate lengths that they're going to to fool Duncan. That or she's just clumsy.

Duncan is speechless as she yells at him for almost getting her run over.

He's smitten, and asks if she wants to have lunch. She's all "I don't think so". BURN.

Flashback to original Tessa, as we see him explaining immortality to here. Not sure if this scene appeared previously in the show or if it's new here. It's a very important scene.

Don't call the cops! He's alive!

Good thing this isn't The Source, he wouldn't revive until the next day.

Duncan sends flowers to Tessa 2.0. She likes this. She's like a slutty version of Tessa, to be blunt. Me likely.

She shows up at Duncan's barge later on. Are we still doing an elaborate ruse to get Duncan? Why not just shoot him?

Duncan suits up to impress, given a second chance of sorts here. I'm quite familiar with this "second chance" feeling. It's a lot of fun.

Duncan introduces his new lady-friend to Richie, who is all "dafuck".

Now HE'S the one all skeptical of Duncan's new friend. Their roles have been flipped from the previous episode.

Tessa talks about Stuff while Duncan gazes and sees little angels and cartoon blue birds hopping around her.

Oh yeah, he also has constant flashbacks to real Tessa during all of this. They're not the same woman, dude! He's doing a disservice to Tessa's memory right now. That said, anyone in his shoes would probably be completely smitten too.

Yeah, he's basically just using her to replace something he lost.

Richie visits Duncan as he basically skips around whistling. Duncan hasn't been this happy in like 18 episodes!

Joe and Richie walk around the dismal grey gardens of Paris. This looks like a Daggerfall area.

The bad guys do a drive-by to take out Joe, and Richie leaps in front of the bullets. "GIVE ME A MINUTE" he says as he keels over.

The theme from Jeopardy plays as we wait. Awesome place, this.

Duncan and Slutty Tessa walk around what appears to be the same set of ruins. This show usually gets a lot of mileage out of whatever ruins they shoot at for any given episode. Legacy and Prodigal Son each utilized a particular landmark too.

They're officially dating now and Duncan is SUPER HAPPY.

I think she likes him too, despite being evil and stuff. I don't even know if she really knows what's going on. They just gave her a bunch of money to get a face-change so she can start over free of The Law, so she rolled with it.

We get the inevitable make-out session!

Followed by the inevitable roll in the hay!

Followed by the inevitable checking her for fever.

She didn't kill him in his sleep or anything. Instead, she rifles through his stuff in the morning. This woman is nosy.

OHHHH SHIT. She finds out about Tessa. Looks like she didn't know what the deal was after all. I suppose it makes sense for Horton to keep her in the dark and just tell her to get close to this guy.

She leaves in a huff, and gets kidnapped by Evil Watchers outside. Is this still part of the elaborate plan? Have they turned on her? I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S HAPPENING ANYMORE.

Duncan frantically makes phone calls. This is exactly like the previous episode where Richie's Bro got kidnapped but it turned out to be a setup. Horton is such an asshole.

Duncan tracks her down. She's tied up while Clint Eastwood plays cards on her leg. I still don't know if she's party to all of this evil scheming or not. It sure looks like she's a captive against her will, but they might be doing some kind of freaky role-playing.

Duncan rescues her, and they're off.

She's all like "what am I doing back on this show" as she storms through the graveyard.

Oh shit! She draws on Duncan. Is she pissed about Tessa or is this part of the elaborate plan?

She fires, and nothing happens. Seems Duncan took all the bullets out when she wasn't looking. Man, he is stealthy.

Horton hears a hoo a gunshot and moves in for the kill. Wait, didn't Duncan take all the bullets out? Did he put one back in and shoot it into the air?

Horton arrives to find Duncan laying in a heap. Did she shoot him or did he quickly convince her to play into a ruse of his own? I'M SO CONFUSED BY THIS

Horton goes to chop off Duncan's head... with a meat cleaver of some sort.

Duncan pops up all "THA HEART! BREAK! KID! LAYS DOWN...FOR NO ONE!"

Horton's like "oh okay" and SHOOTS TESSA after realizing she betrayed him. So she did betray him? MY GOD WHAT IS HAPPENING

Duncan is REALLY ANGRY now. That's two Tessas that have been shot.

Duncan proceeds to dodge all of Horton's bullets until he runs out.

He flees, and runs right into Joe.

What follows is a too-long chase sequence as Duncan chases Horton across a field.

Finally, Horton stops running and whips out a knife. This guy has some serious balls.

Duncan gives him one chance. One shot. Stab him in the heart, or die.

Horton: "Look. If you had... one shot. One opportunity..."

Horton: "To seize everything you ev-GACK"

Duncan repeatedly stabs Horton with his own knife, and that's all she wrote for the big bad.

Horton is dead. FINALLY.

Evil Tessa is also dead. This is so bizarre.

So much for Happy Duncan. I still don't really understand what happened.

They go back to the barge and close it up for the season. Time to go back to Seacouver, because Paris has turned out to be just as problem-filled as his old town.

Take it in. TAKE IT IN I SAY!

They stand there for a moment...

...and they're off.

And that does it for me covering Highlander episodes. I've considered covering Season 3, but given the relatively low hits that these episodes get, I'm going to call it a day here. I will say though that this show is amazing and gets a lot better in S3 onward, so check it out for yourself. The whole series can be bought on DVD for like $30 these days.


  1. Legs make for fine tables.

    Tessa's comeback is not entirely unlike Batista 2014.

    One good thing about heading back to Seacouver is that Maurice has a place to live again.

  2. Your reviews are awesome and hilarious, I greatly enjoy reading them, thanks!

  3. Sorry to see that you didn't cover up season 3 and further:((

    1. You are in luck, because covering Highlander (yes, all four remaining seasons, and the four out of five movies I didn't cover) is high up on the future agenda. I just hope all of my Highlander readers come back for it since it's been so long.

      In the meantime, check out the two posts on Highlander: The Source if you missed them.

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