The Top 13 Worst Square Game Areas

This started out as a "worst RPG areas" list, but I was drawing a blank on non-Square entities so it became a Square list. Not to dump on Square here, as they're my favorite game developer of all time (with Konami and From Software essentially tied with them, but yeah). These are worst areas, so not limited to dungeons. Can also be overworld zones, provinces, etc. Because I'm limited to Squaresoft, the whole list won't be dominated by Phantasy Star 2 dungeons. Also, this list won out over the competition, "Top 10 Thiccest Dragon Quest Maous" so there we go.

Previously posted December 2024 as a top 11, now reposted with two new entries (the top two)

Final Fantasy Legend 3 (Game Boy, 1993)

 

SaGa 3 is upon us. This game was made by an entirely different team from the first two. While the SaGa1+2 team graduated to the SNES to make Romancing SaGa, a new and less-experienced team was brought in to do SaGa 3. That team ended up only making two games: This one and Final Fantasy Mystic Quest.

Looking at the box art here, an 80 page manual is pretty intense for a Game Boy game. I wish I had it. This was the last game I ever bought/played on the original Game Boy before putting it to rest. I think I got the reprint of it because I don't remember it having an 80-page manual.

Most of what I remember about this game is squinting to try and see it on the original Game Boy, and the very weird-ass enemy groupings. I really wasn't a fan of this as a kid, so I'm expecting to like it a lot more by default just playing it on a nice screen. Finally, FFL3 gets a fair shot.

What? There was no DK post here earlier. People are drinking too much Cider.

Final Fantasy Legend 2 (Game Boy, 1991)

 

SaGa 2 as it is known in Japan is probably my favorite Game Boy RPG overall. This gorgeous box cover is essentially a color reverse of Final Fantasy IV's SNES box. It's simple, effective, and leaps off the shelf. I don't think I ever saw this in stores as a kid, and eventually had to emulate it circa 2000. Mostly during a move where I was staying in a motel for a week and played this alongside finishing Lufia.

I don't know if it's actually the best RPG on the Game Boy or if I've been overrating it all this time, but it's definitely one of the best SaGa games. It takes everything that made the previous game good and improves on it. Let's see if I like it less after playing it again... hopefully it doesn't show its age as much as the first one did. This is a prime candidate for "leaving the memories alone" but here we go, my second playthrough ever.

Live-a-Live (Super Famicom, 1994)

The next Super Famicom RPG that I'm going to cover is the relatively-unknown Live-a-Live. In the vein of the SaGa games, this one has a bunch of characters to choose from. The difference is that rather than each of them playing all the way through the same game with slightly-to-moderately different scenarios, in this game they all have a chapter of their own before converging at the end. It's most comparable to Dragon Warrior 4, but the way you can choose the order of the chapters puts a new spin on things. It's almost episodic. You can't really go wrong with mid-90's Square, so let's get to it.

Originally Posted in 2014

Top 15 RPG Overworld Themes of the 90's

Today I'm looking at some of the greatest overworld themes from 90's RPGs. That might seem like an oddly-specific kind of list; the fact is, some of the greatest video game music out there can be found on the world maps of 16- and 32-bit RPGs. Any music that plays on a world map or overworld qualifies. I'm limiting it to one entry per game, which makes for some tough decisions when it comes to the several games on the list with multiple great overworld tunes. I can't promise there won't be a ton of Final Fantasy featured here. It's a subjective list; your mileage may vary. If I left a particularly great overworld theme out, comment below and let me know.

The Final Fantasy Series Retrospective

Today we're going to be taking a look at the Final Fantasy series in retrospective form. What are our memories of the series? Which chapters stand the test of time? Read on to find out.

Front Mission (Super Famicom, 1995)

Front Mission is a once-daily SRPG for the Super Famicom that may lower blood pressure. It never got an American release because Squaresoft and Nintendo were dicks because of localization costs or something. We did get later games in the series over here, but according to nearly everyone on the internet who has played this series, the first game is the best of the lot. I tried Front Mission 4 and couldn't stand it, but I did enjoy Gun Hazard. Let's see what the original brings to the table.

Front Mission: Gun Hazard (Super Famicom, 1996)

This is the sister game to Final Fantasy VI, in a weird way. Kind of like how Zone of the Enders is a sibling to Metal Gear Solid 2. It's an action game that constantly feels like the RPG it's related to. And it's pretty good.

This post is intended to be a fairly quick synopsis of the game. Not going to go very in-depth on this one, because to do so would take a lot more posts. I didn't take very many screenshots as I played it, but I took enough to make use of what I have. The good news is that this will have far fewer spoilers than the usual post since I'm not getting into much depth. In particular, the last quarter of the game will go entirely unspoiled.

Game Review: Final Fantasy III (iOS, Android, PSP, 2011/2012)

Final Fantasy III
System: iOS/Android/PSP
Time to Beat: 30-35 Hours

For a long time, American gamers had no way to play Final Fantasy III outside of emulation. We got the (admittedly far-superior) Final Fantasy VI as our version of FFIII, and that was that. As for the original FFIII... despite two decades passing since the original version hit Japanese store shelves, this Famicom classic never got a direct translation from Squaresoft until the mid-00s.

Final Fantasy III for the DS brought the game to the English-speaking audience with adjusted difficulty, semi-three-dimensional graphics, and dialogue/story that barely existed in the original game. Now, years later, we get the third iteration of the game. This is a port of the DS version, upgraded significantly for modern smartphones. These upgrades include modern hi-res graphics that are far superior to the DS version, remixed music, and new postgame content. However, it's relegated to being on cell phones - historically speaking, not exactly a good gaming platform. Does this limit it, or does the game manage to shine regardless? Read on, as I review a cell phone game for the first time on the site. The game also exists on the PSP, but for the purposes of this review I played the Android version.

Ehrgeiz (Playstation, 1999)

1999 was a big year. People partied like it was, well, 1999. It was Bill Clinton's last full year of being president, most of which he spent battling impeachment charges over whether or not he lied about having sex. While many men lie about having sex, it is a rare thing indeed for a guy to lie about not having sex. But I digress. In the game world, the Sony Playstation was in a roll, riding a momentum wave that was driven partly by Squaresoft putting out the same kind of quality games that had been a huge boon to the Super NES years prior. Meanwhile, over on the other side... the Nintendo 64 existed, and was riding high with...uh... Ocarina of Time and Other.

Ehrgeiz is one of Square's better Playstation efforts. It isn't an RPG (well...mostly) but rather a fighting game. Square has always flirted a bit with the fighting genre, releasing Tobal No. 1 and Bushido Blade prior to this. However, I'd argue that Ehrgeiz was their best run at it for a long time.