S.C.A.T.: Special Cybernetic Attack Team (NES, 1991)

     

A jetpack-based shoot 'em up with an absolutely terrible name, this one has been on my radar for about 30 years. Seriously though, this has to be the worst-named game in the entire NES library. It's a pretty solid Natsume game, though, and deserves a bit of recognition.

This was prominently featured in the very first Nintendo Power I ever read, the legendary Power Blade issue, Volume 23. Man, these NP issues in the 20's had such great color schemes on their covers. Absolutely sumptuous covers with lots of yellow and pink.

At this point I've covered almost all of the games I wanted to check out from this issue. Wow. This and Totally Rad are the last ones.

For powerups we've got:

Laser: Fires powerful direct laser bolts that rip through things. Probably the best weapon to stick with.

Wave: Fires wide beams that cover more area and also do less damage / are less penetrative. This might be better at first before one gets used to the game.

Bomb: Terrible weapon, fires shorter-range exploding shells. Probably does the most damage, but I found it to be a nerf more than anything else, and did everything I could to avoid picking up "B" powerups.

Recover: Picking up an "R" fully heals your character. These are usually found right when you need them most, and it's imperative to never miss grabbing them. They're the key to actually winning at this game.

Speed: Much like Gradius and the like, collecting these just boosts your movement speed. Collect as many as possible, of course. Unlike the Konami series, max speed isn't a detriment here.

Our heroes are... Arnold and Sigourney, which is definitely a pure coincidence! There should have been some unlockable characters, like "Sylvester" and "Dolph" and "Carl"

This game got the coveted fold-out position for this issue. The stages are straightforward and autoscroll, so I'm not sure why you really need maps for them except to see how far along you got if you die close to the end of a level. Regardless, it's good coverage that gets me stoked for the game.

Playing this on the NES catalog of the Switch. Game definitely deserves a spot on this list.

Look at Yoshi's smug face over there.

What? Oh, sorry, got distracted playing Tetris on NES. For my money, this is still the best version of Tetris out there, at least until Tetris Effect for modern systems (which is practically a work of art).

Alright, here we go, the worst-named game on the NES.

A stormy sky lurks over Manhattan as our heroes take on Level 1.

This is all we get for story. Destroy who? Why? Am I the world government's errand boy? Their personal assassin? Their lap-dog? Do they wield a Marker over me?

"Them" repeats the government.

Well alright then, let's go.

Before getting rolling with this game, I was under the impression that it was another jump and shoot style platformer for the NES. However, it's more of a flying shoot 'em up in the Silver Surfer vein, where you're firing away at all times. You even have pods that add to your shot output, like Silver Surfer. This is a considerably better / easier to play game, however.

You actually autofire by holding down the button, which I no longer take for granted. Another thing I don't take for granted: An actual life bar. All the attention that Silver Surfer gets should go to this instead.

Here's the Wave shot, which gives you a wide laser that covers more space. The pods that orbit your character can be stopped in place at any time, and will fire shots in whatever direction they're facing. So you can use them to cover your flanks, or add more firepower to your front-facing barrage.

The first boss is a wall-pod that generates adds to attack from below. I remember this from Nintendo Power; it's one of the first video game boss fights I ever read about.

Level 2 has these obnoxious metal snakes that break apart when defeated, accounting for most of the damage I took on this level.

The gameplay kinda feels like you're using a jet-pack, and you're constantly soaring up and around to snipe foes as they fly onto the screen. Landing on the ground is fine, and bumping into objects won't damage you in any way.

Level 2 boss is another metal snake that zips and coils all around the screen. What's impressive is that it isn't getting totally chopped up by screen flicker.

Level 3 is where the game gets difficult. It's a vertical turbo tunnel of sorts, where the background scrolls by so fast it's nearly nausea-inducing. The best thing to do is focus on the foreground (your character and the enemies) and just ignore the rapidly-scrolling background.

Lose a life in this game and your character shatters into circular particles, like Mega Man.

The level ends with a showdown against a bunch of powerful laser turrets. The game requires fast twitch reflexes at this point, though they DO follow a consistent pattern. Winning the boss fights is almost like a dance, finding the right spot to move side to side in the right rhythm to avoid all of the incoming enemy shots.

That wasn't even the boss, this WALL OF DEATH is. Much like Silver Surfer, enemies have no apparent i-frames, and you can fire as fast as your shots disappear from the screen. So getting up close to the boss weak point and rapid-firing is a good way to utterly decimate their HP.

Level 4 is...a space aircraft carrier?

I don't know, but "them" have to be defeated. Earth is counting on us!

Probably the most interesting level, this ship is HUGE and covered in guns (most of which can be taken apart).

It's particularly fun to blow up the giant tank guns on the decks.

The boss of this mammoth level is basically the exhaust pipes (guess it isn't an electric vehicle) that belch out blue fire. The main threat is the barrage of smaller missiles that can't be intercepted. Again, getting up-close and ripping the boss apart with rapid fire is the way to go.

Finally, the space fortress of "them"! This is it for the game. Pretty short game. Good to finally clear out more of Nintendo Power Volume 23.

The last level is a more standard left-to-right level, with these bullet sponge Baldo Gardens refugees.

Main issue here are these reflect lasers that are more of a puzzle to figure out, since these turrets can't be destroyed.

After the geometry lesson that is this level, I arrive at the final boss:

This thing looks like a Contra refugee, and fires off these waves of super-fast lasers. Lot of twitch reflexes required in this game.

I get up close and blast away with the Laser to secure a fairly quick win. This thing is vaguely Alien-esque. Kind of surprised there weren't more 80's movie references in this game, considering the names of the main characters. I was expecting all kinds of Xenomorphs and Predators running around, but nope.

Our heroes return to Earth, and get a party thrown by the President, whoever that is.

...and then about 50% of their fanbase immediately turns on them due to the association, despite that they saved Earth. Maybe by then there is a viable three-party system...which means 67% of their fanbase turned on them!

"I need a vacation" says Arnold.

That game...certainly existed. It isn't great but it isn't bad either. One game left from Volume 23, and I have super high hopes for Totally Rad. At least, I think I do.