Highlander 5x10 - The Valkyrie

 

It's Kanye West's favorite (...or least-favorite?) episode, with Duncan rocking Hugo Boss Drip as he tries to stop Hitler in 1944 and end the war (which, at that point, the winner had already been decided and it was just dragging on). Of course, what ended up being called "Operation Valkyrie" would fail, and millions more people died needlessly while Germany got folded up like an accordion. Eventually the high command ran out of morphine pills and realized they had made a mistake.

Drugs: They'll make you feel like YOU can defeat the Soviet Union and British Empire at the same time!

Not real crazy about doing this episode. In this era of people calling everyone they don't like a "nazi" (and occasionally actually believing it) it just seems like a minefield to even talk about the subject. However, as a person in full-on "doesn't really give a shit anymore" mode at this point in life, I suppose I'll just go ahead and do the episode.

I was just going to do the previous three episodes for the moment, but I'm throwing a bonus episode onto this arc because there'll be a break before the Horsemen Arc drops on here. It'll be a little while before that, and the back half of Season 5, so I can savor all of it before Season 6 falls off a cliff like Debra Campbell.

Moscow! Oh great, I gotta talk about nazis and now I gotta talk about America's other big cultural boogeyman, The Russians.

We start with this Not-Gorbachev guy running for president in Russia and vowing to bring back the USSR and communism, etc. This was the 90's, during the dismal lull between the end of the USSR and the election of Putin in 2000 / subsequent economic climb back up for Russia's working class. People were pretty unhappy at this point in time, and things weren't going so hot in the new Russian government, so a guy like Not-Gorbachev here would be able to challenge the new status quo and demand a return to when things "worked".

First thing's first on his agenda: Why do they have a red/white/blue flag? Those are the colors of the Americans! ...and those seedy French. We will go back to the hammer and sickle and the good times! Vodka rations for all, and a fifth of a chicken in every pot!

Here he is watching his own speech. "I fill their bellies not with food, but with hate, by telling them who to blame everything on." ...The Jews? It's always The Jews.

I feel like we already had a similar episode to this in the past, where some Eastern European would-be dictator was trying to get power somewhere.

The scheming-fest is interrupted by...Russia's finest hooker, apparently? MORE WOODKA!

Nope, she's an assassin, and she takes both of them out John Wick style. She also gets shot in the process and gets back up, so she's our immortal of the week, Ingrid.

Also, the communist dictator guy didn't last long, I guess that's it for that story. Boris Yeltsin's drunken reign continues uninterrupted!

Elsewhere, Duncan/Methos/Joe are hanging out, watching boxing. Can we just have the whole episode be these guys hanging out and chatting? This would be a great episode.

Nope, it's flashback time, with Duncan hanging out with Ingrid in 1935 Germany. He was a British intelligence officer, she was his German contact, as he spied on NSDAP.

Always throws me off when I see Duncan working for the British. Whatta sell-out! SCOTSMAN FOR LIFE!

Actually, him going from fighting against the British for a lot of the first half of his life, to working for the British for a lot of the second half of his life, demonstrates an ability to grow/change that the vast majority of the immortals on this show don't really exhibit. They're all trapped in the loop of the past. Imagine if Duncan was an IRA guy, railing against the British to this very day and still being angry about stuff that happened in 1921, ranting about Belfast while he scowls through life. That's what a lot of the villains in this show are like.

Duncan's friend is being harassed by brownshirts, who beat him up for saying the wrong things to someone in a conversation they overheard on the street. That pesky free speech! Truly a danger to the truth!

This leads to Duncan BRAWLING WITH BROWNSHIRTS. Man is the most conspicuous secret agent ever!

Why wasn't Adrian Paul ever tapped to play James Bond? The guy is a shoe-in. Absolute shoe-in, no question.

Anyway, back in the present, they're reunited when she shows up in town, wandering into this boxing match for some reason.

Funny moment: Methos just up and took off the minute she showed up. He isn't really into introductions. He's on high alert at all times, like a rabbit.

Something I just realized: Methos spending lots of time around (a select few) other immortals actually allows him to escape unnoticed from virtually any situation. Nobody will even know he's an immortal, they'll just assume the person he was with was who they sensed.

Duncan brings her back to his swingin' bachelor pad. I'm only now realizing that I'm not sure if the stonework on the right is actual stonework or just wallpaper. Considering this place is basically one room and has to function as a kitchen, living room, and bedroom, Duncan has really optimized the space.

Smooth jazz begins playing as Ingrid crosses her legs. Not sure if her and Duncan were even involved in the past, or if they just had a flirtation. We've already seen that she just naturally uses sex appeal in her regular interactions.

Either way, let's not get too excited, this won't be a Cassandra situation again. She's here on business and won't be around long.

Not long at all, as she has a couple sips of alcohol and takes off!

I'm noticing that Duncan drinks a LOT in this series. Did he always do that for the entire series or did it get more common over time? Well, at least it isn't drugs, we saw what that did to Europe's best swordsman Brian Cullen. Immortality is no assistance against addiction.

Duncan and Methos are out grabbing newspapers when...

...Duncan spots an ad for a speech by New Freedom Party leader Alan Wilkinson. Given their stereotypical "tyrannical regime" logo, chances are THIS is why Ingrid is in town!

Here's Alan Wilkinson, under-lit to make him extra menacing on his dark stage while he yells White Power slogans into the mic. Dude, this isn't going to make you very electable. Everyone and their mom is going to go "he looks like every tyrannical evil movie senator ever", and that's BEFORE they hear him speak!

Wait, isn't this basically Washington State? As if they'd ever elect a guy like this to the Senate. Their candidates are usually a choice between someone who hugs trees and someone who hugs trees slightly less, and their biggest point of contention is whether or not to also hug bears.

Ingrid shows up, as predicted.

"Sorry, I can't let you kill the nazi" says Duncan when reached for comment while Ingrid pouts.

She pulls a gun, Duncan grabs it from her, and just as they draw attention, she runs away quick enough to frame Duncan by yelling "HE'S GOT A GUN"

She's been trained well in the art of escape. Her and Amanda would get along.

Following that disaster, Duncan gets interrogated by a detective.

This guy is basically Columbo if he were played by a very old Ricardo Montalban. He's the best character in the episode, highly-intelligent and wise. He sees right through Duncan's facade that he doesn't know Ingrid, and only questions whether Duncan is in on her assassinations or just caught up in her life. He also knows that she killed the Russian would-be dictator, who he shed no particular tears for. You see, this detective is himself from Eastern Europe, and grew up dealing with men like that.

Back at the pad, Ingrid let herself in, and says that she studied under British intelligence, the CIA, and M******d.

Duncan is like "Must be nice being judge, jury, and executioner"

bro what

Meanwhile! Back in the past!

Never let a world war get in the way of being a charming ladykiller!

They're meeting with a turncoat colonel, Claus Stauffenberg, to scheme an assassination attempt against Adolf.

This guy was legitimately the mastermind of Operation Valkyrie.

I will call him... Eyepatch Wulf.

He questions Duncan's ability to pass for a German, after which Duncan stands at attention and belts out a bunch of perfect German before sieg heiling.

"That'll do" says Eyepatch Wulf.

We almost never hear any other languages on this show, and chances are our heroes speak a few, so it's interesting to see Duncan actually make use of one. The lack of any French-speaking is still odd though. In theory he should be using it a lot throughout the series.

Ingrid is having some doubts about this whole thing. She's young for an immortal (like 90 years old at this point), and has never killed anyone. Their plan to set off a bomb in Hitler's vicinity is going to also take out a bunch of officers. Men with families.

Duncan notes that it'll also get rid of Hitler, which means the end of the war and who knows how many more men with families being spared from that continuing.

Make a note that it's Duncan who is espousing the virtues of some dying for the greater good here. In the present-day, they've flipped on the matter.

Our heroes close in on the meeting Hitler is attending at the Wolf's Lair bunker, bomb suitcase in tow.

Eyepatch Wulf insists that he stay in the room and make sure it goes off correctly, since they're only getting one shot at this. Duncan then in turn insists that HE stay in the room, since Eyepatch will be necessary for the negotiations with the Allies and so forth that follow, and Duncan is just some expendable guy.

Eyepatch Wulf: "The people of Europe won't forget the name of the man who gave his life for this."

Duncan: "If you don't mind, I'd like to stay anonymous"

Duncan's fake German name is "Colonel Frick" (no seriously).

It appears that at this point in the war, even the Sieg Heils are subdued and limp.

This Field Marshal says that Colonel Frick here better have a good explanation for how British convoys continue to get through and supply Ze Red Army.

Our heroes quickly get the suitcase bomb timer going (ten minutes) and hurry to the meeting.

In the meeting, Hitler is ranting and raving about how nothing is going right and "ZE GUNS DON'T WORK"

Look, you guys decided to fight the RUSSIANS. And the BRITISH EMPIRE. At the SAME TIME. And then you wonder why you're losing? What morphine dose are you on for the day?

The guy playing Hitler kind of looks like if Dana Carvey had done a Hitler impression.

ZE WEAPONS...ZEY ARE USE-LESS!

Eyepatch Wulf gets a "call" and has to excuse himself, leaving Colonel Frick to start the presentation on why they're letting British aid convoys get through.

But wait, as soon as Eyepatch Wulf leaves the room, one of the other officers in the room moves his briefcase out of the way...way out of the way, to the other side of the giant table. This means the explosion might not reach Hitler. The bomb is small, by necessity. It's enough to take out this room, but it needs to be close to the target.

Duncan walks over to the briefcase to move it back.

In the most un-subtle way possible.

Everyone turns to look at him.

Good God, man. What are you doing?

Ten minutes are up, the Wolf's Lair EXPLODES.

So, if Eyepatch Wulf had stayed and done it himself like he wanted to, the mission would have succeeded. His leaving is the only reason the suitcase got moved... and Duncan flubbed it when he went to move it back. All he had to do was walk over and pick it up! He was there WITH Wulf as an aide, so it wouldn't have drawn any suspicion if he went and picked up Wulf's suitcase.

Everyone in there was either killed or injured...except Hitler, who barely got charred, since the bomb was too far away from him. He got some dust in his nose, that's about it. Great job, Duncan.

A weeping Ingrid tries to shoot him with the world's tiniest gun, takes too long because she feels terrible about it, and gets gunned-down.

That and I'm pretty sure that gun wouldn't have gotten the job done anyway, unless she had like 40 tiny bullets for it.

"It is the ultimate in arrogance to think that one person can change the course of history!" bellows Methos before talking about how things could have gone worse after their successful operation. "If Hitler were killed in 1943 like Rommel wanted, Germany might have actually won the war."

He's right. The outcome was all about lack of alliances and engaging too many foes at a time. Rommel was actually smart.

In his hypothetical, it's probably more likely that a ceasefire gets brokered much sooner, since Rommel wasn't high on morphine like most of their leadership was. A ceasefire with the West, anyway, chances are Germany and Russia would have continued slugging it out for years to come and ultimately reached a stalemate with a redrawn map of Europe.

Joe says none of this debate matters, what matters is that Ingrid is Duncan's friend.

Methos: "Pretty smart...for a kid."

Duncan: "I don't know how to stop her."

Methos: "Don't you?"

Duncan: "......No. I don't."

Oof.

Back at the dojo, our detective friend has decided that Duncan is a liar and possibly a co-conspirator, with an officer of his having witnessed Ingrid leaving the building.

Worth noting: He chews toothpicks all the time because he has long-since given up smoking, and it functions as a distraction.

They go downtown for an interrogation, where Duncan continues to play dumb for a while.

The episode's best character susses out that Ingrid is an old friend of Duncan's. "Old friends are the worst" he says. "They claim more of your soul."

This lands with Duncan, and he seems to respect the guy more after that, telling him what Ingrid is trying to do.

The detective tells a story about how communists in Romania dragged his father away in the middle of the night and killed him, because he was writing problematic poetry.

The kicker is that his family had escaped from the nazis not too long before that, and said father thought they would be safer somewhere else. They weren't.

Basically, the detective here has zero desire to protect would-be despots from Ingrid, but it's his job. Duncan also wants to stop her, so on that, they agree.

Later, Methos hilariously pretends to be Duncan's lawyer so he can talk to him (not that it's necessary, as Duncan was free to go). Methos claims to have the paperwork to be anything, from lawyer to "Indian Chief". Didn't realize that this required paperwork. Then again, Duncan is a Formally Trained Native American, as we learned in episode 5 where he tracked down Tessa by following bear footprints and listening to the wind.

Elsewhere, a detective locates Ingrid...only to get shot by her. So she's got no problem killing people now, eh?

The main detective goes and tells Duncan what happened, and Duncan goes into shock. The Ingrid he knew struggled with violence, and couldn't just kill like this.

Detective: "I hope you have a dark suit, for soon you will be going to a funeral of a friend."

He then proceeds to ambush Ingrid, who is disguised as an old lady, outside of Freedom Party HQ when she goes to intercept a decoy dressed as Alan Wilkinson. She tries to shoot the detective, he shoots first.

Later that evening, the detective has a smoke and a drink for the first time in years, having just had to kill somebody, and has an interesting chat with Duncan about whether or not he was on the right side.

"When I was a boy, everything was black and white, good and evil. Then I grew up and discovered there was only gray."

Back at Authoritarian Dictatorship HQ, our heroes keep a lookout for Ingrid as the speech gets underway. Methos is getting a headache listening to this guy!

Wilkinson gesticulates wildly and rants and raves while a roomful of people applaud politely.

Duncan remembers Hitler when he looks at the guy...and realizes there's a bomb in the room.

He goes outside and sure enough, Ingrid is out there. She's got the detonator in her hand, just finishing a smoke before she sets it off.

Duncan asks her to reconsider and not kill dozens of people, and she refuses.

It's a striking parallel to one of their 1944 conversations, where Duncan convinces her TO kill dozens of people, if needed, to end the war.

Duncan says this is different, there's no war, it's just people who went to a speech, and begs her not to press the button.

She goes for it, so he has to swing.

Thish ish... a fairly depressing quickening

Ingrid's failure to stop Hitler, and attempts to make up for it over and over again for the rest of time, end here.

Quite frankly, she's been dead for a while already. I think she died outside that bunker, when she failed to shoot and felt responsible for the millions more deaths that followed.

As Duncan carries Ingrid away, we hear the detective's words again.

"When I was a boy, everything was black and white, good and evil. Then I grew up and discovered there was only gray."

Methos takes a long walk, and it seems like most of the folks here are none the wiser about what happened.

Duncan talks about how Ingrid judged others, and he judged Ingrid. So who judges him? Followed by him and Methos looking at each other.

In light of how Duncan once turned evil, I once thought this was some serious foreshadowing that Methos was going to need to slay him at some point in the future. That isn't the case, though. Besides that, we're an episode away from finding out about all the skeletons in the Methos closet.

This one was pretty young, and seemed like a legitimately good person in the 1930's/40's flashbacks.

Going to say that this was a REALLY good episode. The best one in a bit now.

Was never much of a fan of it when I was younger, thought it was "okay", but it's actually one of the better stories in this season. The ending was powerful, though it'd be more powerful if Duncan didn't kill so many friends of his already.

Lastly:

Here's the real Colonel Claus Stauffenberg when he was in good health, before he had the eyepatch and lost a hand in combat. He was an important part of Operation Barbarossa and several other German military campaigns before deciding enough was enough.

A few hours after the explosion at Wolf's Lair, he was rounded up and executed by firing squad. He was buried by the Wehrmacht with military honors, before being dug up by SS members and unceremoniously cremated with no memorial.

As he now has no grave, there is today a memorial to him on that street instead:

Other Highlander Posts