Wednesday, May 11, 2016

Mega Man 10 (XBox 360, Playstation 3, Wii, 2010)

 Today I'm looking at... wait a minute, this is from 2010? Are we sure that I didn't just get dropped back in time to 1990? Hulkamania is running wild all over again! BAD DUDES!

The opening screen of the game helpfully explains the passage of time. This would be of great assistance to a guy I saw commenting on Youtube wondering why one episode of a show had a different intro from another episode that came earlier in time.

Meanwhile, Mega Man's sister is dealing with some PMS. It's one of those heavy days.

Roboenza? The fuck is Roboenza? Nice job, ROLL. Look at how much you're upsetting Auto!

Dr. Light gives us an IMPORTANT bit of plot right here, so remember it for later.

....HAHAHA. No, I'm kidding. This game doesn't have any plot. Did you think this was the beginnings of the Maverick Virus seen in the Mega Man X series? That would make a lot of sense, so no.

But seriously... keep this in mind. "It only affects robots".

Without the long-awaited-by-some-fans connection to the X series, the killer virus in this game loses whatever menace it could have had. The game is nothing more than fanservice for the old-school Mega Man player. Which is me, so let's do this.

The funny thing is, without their robot helpers, Future People are so inept that they can't perform simple tasks. In the present day, this dilemma would be faced only by Mitt Romney, who hasn't wiped his own ass in over a decade.

Once the flu subsides, it turns into robot-rabies.

Luckily, the heroic Dr. Wily has developed a cure for Roboenza... only to have it get stolen by eight robot masters! Despite being a genius scientist, Dr. Light is horrified by this development and sends Mega Man to help out his nemesis.

I'm surprised that after this shot, Dr. Wily didn't turn to the screen and laugh menacingly. Don't worry Capcom, you wouldn't be giving anything away.

A chance encounter with Mega Man's boyfriend brother Protoman, and we're off to save the day. No sign of Bass in the story because he was added as DLC. ...even though he's on the title screen, and I'm sure he could have been included with the game. Finally, definitive proof that this game is actually from 2010: the developers took content out of the game and sold it separately as optional DLC!

"Consumers love choices!" said EA when reached for comment.

 That hole in Mega Man's foot never fails to weird me out.

Speaking of content, that overused but useful word, this game has a lot of it. There are time attack challenges and just plain ol' challenges. With all of the options for pushing the envelope, Mega Man pros will get a lot of enjoyment out of this game.

Things get underway with a character select. Bachelor #1 is the classic hero of the story, our Mega Hero, Mega Man. In this game he's reduced to as bare-bones of a character as possible. He can't charge his shot, he can't slide... it's a regression to Mega Man 1 levels.

Next we have Mega Man's archnemesis bro, Protoman. Or is it Break Man? He can slide, charge shots, and automatically blocks incoming projectiles when not firing. In other words, he's WAY BETTER than Mega Man. Why would anyone play as Mega Man when this guy has all of the powers that the Blue Bomber usually has, and more?

And then we have the DLC character, Bass (pronounced "base", not "ass"). He can dash, Mega Man X style, which is subtly different from the slide. It's worse for evasion, but better for moving fast, and it adds velocity to jumps. He also has super rapid-fire, but can't move once he starts rattling off shots. Since being able to play as Bass in an original series game is rare, I chose him for this playthrough.


Bass is a fairly badass character. He's a Wily creation, but he turns on his creator to join Mega Man at some point. I've heard rumors that this guy is actually a Zero prototype, which makes some sense. The source of these rumors? Zero's ultimate form in Command Mission looks like Bass. If Bass is a Zero prototype, then Wily should have put him on a shorter leash.

We've got a few options for difficulty with this one. It's a much-needed change and makes the game pretty accessible. Hard is brutal, Normal is good for people who want to play a fairly standard Mega Man, and Easy is for little kids and people who are just trying to get screenshots for a post.

 The game helpfully illustrates the differences between the difficulty levels; this screen has more enemies on Hard mode, and on Easy mode you get lots of extra red platforms to help with crossing spike pits.

We know Capcom has used up nearly all available boss options when they're borrowing from MMX (Chill Man) and have a baseball-themed boss (Strike Man). And the less said about Sheep Man, the better.

...that said, I choose him as my first opponent. Typically, you can get a good idea of what kind of weapon a Mega Man boss will use against you from their name. Not in this case. What will he attack our hero with? If Capcom has taught me anything, it's that this guy's weapon could be any random combination of words. My money is on the erotic sensation known as "Penis Thunder".

Bass has some great abilities, like being able to fire in any direction. This is tremendously useful and negates any air superiority some enemies would have had over Mega Man.

Here's Bass' dash move. I'm so glad to finally play a classic Mega Man game with a dash function. It's the primary reason I prefer the X series. Adds an entirely new dimension to gameplay when you can do stuff like dash and wall jump.

...well, Bass can't wall jump. His double jump from Rockman and Forte is also nowhere to be found. Well, he's already OP enough.

This game also has the P-Chips that most of the post-MM3 classic games have. What does the P stand for? My money is, again, on the crowd-pleasing "Penis Thunder".

Odd miniboss here, some kind of light bulb that you have to turn on (via running the conveyor belts) before you can damage it. Bass completely trivializes this fight by being able to fire upward. Bass is practically made for speed runs since he doesn't have to ever wait for enemies to "get into range".

Here's Sheep Man, destroyer of worlds. Even with no special weapons, he's easily defeated. Bass is overpowered to begin with, and the challenge presented by Sheep Man is pretty low. One of the easiest first bosses in the series.

AHA, here's his weapon. It doesn't make too much sense, especially considering the "wool" in question is a cloud. But hey.

Pump Man's stage is a sewer. You know, the last time I was in a club and a hot girl attempted to dance with me, I was all "The next Mega Man game needs to have a sewer level" and then she was like "WHAT?" and I was all "The next Mega Man game needs to have a sewer level" and then she said "YOU'RE FUNNY!" before being escorted away by her friends.

While Mega Man has his Rush powers that let him summon his dog Rush to jump higher, fly in straight lines, swim in straight lines, and hear hilarious quips about liberals... what does Bass have for a mobility power from the start? Well, he can fly wherever he wants. No, really. It's overpowered, like most of Bass' abilities. It's becoming increasingly clear that they completely shafted Mega Man in this game.

Pump Man is the boss-with-a-phallic-name-du-jour for this game. Most Mega Man games have at least one. Hard Man, Drill Man, Junk Man, and, if you're unlucky, Needle Man. I think Dr. Wily builds these phallicly-named robots just to express his own frustration at being too ancient to get a boner.

Solar Man's stage is basically Fire Man Mk10. If you've seen a Mega Man fire level, you've seen this one. Music is pretty rad, though.

A pair of powerful birds are the minibosses here, and Bass again trivializes them with his ability to shoot upwards. I like how nonchalant he looks about it.

Solar Man is the next boss I take on. He is solar-powered and environmentally sound.

Pump Man's shield weapon makes short work of him. Another thing most of these games have is a shield weapon, and they're nearly always useful. Also, turns out Pump Man was weak to Sheep Man's weapon. I figured since he was (sort of) a water boss, he'd be weak to the electric weapon. It was a good guess, and the good guesses would continue. While I -have- played this game before, it was years ago. I might possess some residual memory from that, but for the most part I was winging it this playthrough. Let's see if I can remember who to take on next...

THIS...IS... THE QUICKENING~!

Ah, I remember now. Chill Man's stage is next, complete with sweet ice pyramids. Since I just got the fire weapon, let's do this.

This is probably my favorite level in the game. The music here is good, and the level just LOOKS nice. Though I just watched The Thing, so icy places aren't my favorite right now. That movie is messed-up.

When playing on Easy, you'll often find the Yashichi from the original Mega Man peppering the landscape. This thing fully restores your health and ALL weapons. Whoa.

Chill Man is the one robot master in this game that still gives me a fair amount of grief. He looks like Mr. Freeze.

"ICE TO MEET YOU."

His weapon involves placing spikes on the floor and hoping that enemies will run into them. Unless this game has car enemies at some point, I can't see how this will be usef-

-what the shit? Car enemies? I KNOW JUST WHAT TO DO.

Nitro Man is the boss of this automobile-themed stage. Unfortunately, he isn't a vehicle.

....BUT WAIT! He transforms into one to attack, and quickly falls victim to Bass' road spikes. Nitro Man was then purchased for pennies by Vince McMahon's WWF.

Strike Man's stage is sports-themed. It may well be the most memorable of the eight stages in this game due to the weirdness. I made a mistake here by choosing this stage next; I got the boss order right otherwise, but this one should have been saved for last.

Strike Man himself looks like a badder-ass Toad Man. ......wait, that should be "a bad-ass Toad Man".

Commando Man's stage brings back memories of Pharoah Man's stage in Mega Man 4. Actually, a lot of things in this game bring back memories of MM4. Protoman's charge shot, Strike Man's look, Solar Man's weapon, a number of stage designs, and so forth.

That's right, Protoman's charge shot...


...is the one from Mega Man 4.

Commando Man's stage is a good one. Desert-themed and has some interesting obstacles, like these sand-waves that obscure your vision.

Commando Man himself is a big bad tank-bot with gun arms. I could have sworn we already had a boss like this in the series. Maybe I'm thinking of Grenade Man.

The last boss I take on is Blade Man.

...I gotta wonder what all of these bosses were originally constructed for before they "went bad". You know, those "simple tasks" they helped people do. We know that Strike Man played baseball, Commando Man fought terror, and Sheep Man kept the young men happy. What did Blade Man do, though? Was he a shaving implement? Did he chop vegetables for people? What did any of these robots do that people can't do on their own?

His stage is full of sharp weapons and gun emplacements that are refugees from other Mega Man titles. It's a castle theme and vaguely reminds me of Knight Man's stage.

As you continue, Mega Man (or your chosen hero) goes through the castle itself.

Despite having all seven of the other weapons in the game, I couldn't figure out Blade Man's weakness, and ended up just fighting him with the arm cannon. Which, given Bass' ability to fire in every direction except straight down, wasn't much of a handicap.

Editor's Note: His weakness is Commando Man's weapon, specifically hitting him with the explosion/shockwave from it after it impacts with a wall. Several of the weapons in this game have differing damage output depending on HOW they hit; this one is a good example of that.

I finally pay a visit to the P-Chip shop. It's run by Reggae, a mechanical duck with tourettes.

With all eight bosses defeated, Dr. Wily appears and reveals that HE was the one behind the outbreak of Roboenza! No way! I thought we were friends, Wily! I THOUGHT WE WERE FRIENDS!

The iconic W pops up on the stage select. Why did Wily do such a bad thing? Is it because of his boner frustration? Dude, there are pills for that!

I bet that's exactly it, considering his castle is partly made of bones. Skull Fortress isn't just a base... it's a cry for help.

Bass plods through the pouring rain to get to the fortress. Go Bass! We're depending on you, because Roll's PMS won't cure itself.

The fortress is full of spikes, but there are alternate paths where you don't have to deal with them at all.

The first "boss fight" here repeats several times. It's basically a contraption that emulates bosses of past games, sorta like the Doc Robots of Mega Man 3. Putting the weapons or attack patterns of past bosses into a generic body means Capcom can appeal to nostalgia without running out of game memory. Though since this game is actually a modern game disguised as a retro game, I'm not sure if that was a concern.

In any case, this fight repeats three times, each one with three different bosses of the past (each with a third of a life meter). Interestingly enough there is one boss from each of the previous nine games: Elec Man, Wood Man, Gemini Man, Ring Man, Napalm Man, Flame Man, Slash Man, Frost Man, and Tornado Man.

 Wily Stage 2 is full of these pillars that slam down, resulting in insta-death if you're caught. They seem to have an erratic pattern.

The next boss is a giant metal crab. I wonder what job this thing had before the great Roboenza outbreak. I bet it went to schools and warned kids about the dangers of promiscuity.

Some of these Wily levels are aquatic, which may be Capcom's way of making up for not having a water level in this game. Here we see a mechanical shrimp... WITH A HAT ON. Forget Zero, all Wily needs to get his ultimate victory over Mega Man is to build more of these guys.

Also appearing: A variation of the Rock Monster from so many other games in this series, made out of tiles from the floor and walls. I'll say this: it's the easiest Rock Monster variant in the whole series.

A staple of Mega Man games, the boss capsule room varies in difficulty from game to game. In most of them, like this one, it's pretty easy if you know all of their weaknesses.

For instance, the deadly Sheep Man fears Strike Man's ball weapon. Thank God I figured this out in time. Just... thank God.

Dr. Wily's skull tank sports a pirate hat and fires super-phallic missiles out of its mouth. Do we really need to hammer the point home, Wily?

Luckily, that nearly-pornographic phase of the battle doesn't last long. Wily Stage 2 could be a nasty foe, but with Bass' ability to fire diagonally, he falls quickly. Who knew that all this time Mega Man could have easily beaten Wily if he could just point his arm diagonally?

But wait! The game isn't over yet. The final level is all the way up in space. It's surprising that Capcom made another "map screen" like this just for one level. Wouldn't have minded getting an entirely new set of castle levels. The majority of the classic Mega Man games have two sets of castle levels, starting I believe with Mega Man 4 (unless you count the Doc Robot stages in MM3). The Mega Man X series never adopted this idea, for some reason, and many of the castle stages in those games (particularly X4) are the shortest levels in the game. It's like the MMX creators didn't like castle stages and just wanted to get them over with quickly.

I guess this space station is upside-down gravity-wise because the W is flipped. It's a cool touch.

It's a short stage, and nothing spectacular, which makes it even weirder that it has its own map.

The final battle is with Dr. Wily in his saucer...and there are two of him? Egad! Only one of the two can be damaged at any time, and since they simultaneously teleport around you never know which is the real Wily...unless you squint. The fake one is grayscale. It's a good fight, as the saucer battles generally are.

The game concludes with Wily being subdued yet again.

 Wait, what? Wily...has Roboenza? Does that mean...he's turning robot? Is the series bridge finally happening?

...no, because they don't explain or follow up on this and it's the last classic Mega Man. Still, pretty bizarre scene here.

 Our heroes put him in jail and he IMMEDIATELY ESCAPES. You know, usually they wait until the next game to tell you that your efforts were for naught, but this one cuts right to the chase. The Mega Man X series is pretty serious, but the classic series is basically a Benny Hill cartoon. Question is, will they make a Mega Man 11? Will they ever connect this series to the later games? What's with Wily catching Roboenza?

Onward.

Read my official Mega Man 10 review!

The Three Decade Project!

Other Mega Man Posts!

4 comments:

  1. Hi-larious. Hope Roll got better. IIRC Thunder Wool is an almost completely useless weapon, which fits the robot master that has it.

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  2. There is one very large difference when playing as Proto Man... he takes double damage. So if anything it's playing as him that's hard mode.

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  3. In the Commando Man shot you're thinking of Napalm Man from Mega Man 5.

    I tend to not like castle levels and want to get them over with myself!

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  4. This was a really fun post. Really glad I finally got around to it. I agree that Roboenza as the Maverick Virus would've been fascinating. It's so weird that Capcom has all the pieces they need to connect the series but they just didn't pull the trigger on it.
    It was fun to see a playthrough as non-Bass, and it's excellent that you get to play as Proto Man, something we all wished for back in the day.
    It's pretty encouraging that MM9 was such a hit they made this one. Even the music sounds like the kind of advanced stuff we can do now that we've thought hard about NES technology and know all the new stuff we can do with it.
    Being easier than its predecessors is another parallel this has with MM4.

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