Mighty Final Fight (NES, 1993)

 This great little game is a spinoff of the Final Fight series, made exclusively for the NES well past the system's prime. It features chibi versions of the characters, a relatively lighthearted plot, and easier gameplay. I expected it to be a bit of a joke game and it ended up being a fun time. Only from Capcom!

Repost to join the others.

Why does her beauty give people the power to survive? How depressed IS this town? Is Metro City... Baltimore?

 Dammit! No! Leave that beacon of light alone!

 Enter Mayor Mike Haggar, one of the cooler Capcom characters out there. He's the world's toughest mayor.

 The other two guys are Guy (just Guy) and Cody Rhodes. Guy is a martial artist, while Cody is Jessica's boyfriend. Together, they're teaming up to fight crime and save Jessica.

 Haggar is the strongest, and slowest. Guy is the fastest, and weakest. I think. It's hard to tell. Cody seems to be the balanced character. He's also the son of the son of a plumber.

This seems to be an NES retelling of the first game in the series, with a more kid-friendly look.

 Get ready for FIVE STAGES OF PAIN as we take on the Mad Gear Gang all around the city!

 It's your standard side-scrolling beat 'em up action, with slightly less realistically-proportioned characters than the SNES games. This is also much easier than those games, reinforcing the idea that this was Final Fight 4 Kidz. The low difficulty means it's a lot of fun to play, though. You can pretty much just plow your way through this game in a half hour.

 Whoa, it's Rolento! This guy eventually made his way to the Street Fighter series, like several other villains from this game.

 Cody unleashes a fierce uppercut at the end of his combos that looks right out of Ken and Ryu's movesets.

 Rolento has already returned from the dead as Purple Rolento.

By now you've noticed the level and EXP indicators at the bottom of the screen. They're exactly what they look like. You start at level 1 and can ascend up to level 6, with each level requiring a certain amount of EXP from defeating foes. Every level gives you a bigger health bar and possibly more damaging attacks, hard to say. It's pretty weird to have a level up system in a game that takes 30 minutes to beat at the most, but I'm glad they did it.

You're almost guaranteed to naturally level to 6 while playing through the game anyway, and getting EXP adds a little bit of a fun edge to plowing through all of these enemy hordes.

 MOVIE is now open. Not sure what kind of a movie it is, considering the poster features two redheads in tank tops.

 Cody falls into a pit and crashes into a warehouse far below. What is this, Final Fantasy Adventure?

 The first boss is Thrasher, of the Headbangers. He claims to run Metro City, much like 50 Cent claims to run New Yaw.

 You actually get a dialogue option here. And somewhere, a future developer of Mass Effect had a lightbulb go on above their head.

 The best way to fight bosses in this game is to spam flying kicks. Getting in close to wail on them is a bit tougher than the usual enemies because they tend to have a lot of reach.

 Here's stage two, where someone has spraypainted "Nitro" on a nearby wall. And somewhere, a lightbulb went on above Eric Bischoff's head. Who knew Mighty Final Fight was this influential?

 Poison shows up here, with a Sasha Banks purple mane.

 Cody busts out the V-Trigger! What will Kenny say?

 Here's Sodom, whose name was changed to Katana in U.S. versions of the series. Weird seeing this guy in superdeformed form. He's also the stage two boss in the first Final Fight on the SNES, and might be the toughest boss overall in that game. It's worth noting that this game likes to cut off text with awkward line breaks that frequently let you fill in the rest with your imagination. You're no what? No Kick Master?

 ...oh.

" ...ass cheeks"?

 ...oh.

 …"-chop your pee-pee"?

 ...oh.

 This is actually a rough fight for this game, like it is in the others. He blocks most attacks and the sword-rush attack is difficult to avoid. Jumping attacks and getting out of the way are the way to go, though if you have enough health/lives you can also spam special attacks (A+B together) to get him out of the way.

 A Street Fighter II style minigame follows where you break barrels for exp. This is more satisfying than breaking barrels for mere points.

 Got a little over 10% of a level. It's the closest thing Mighty Final Fight has to MMO dailies.

 Stage three is the nice part of town, with gated communities. At least, it's nice until The American Nightmare Cody Rhodes runs into a big boot from...

 ...Rolento, who is WAY too happy about all of this.

With my first game over, Cody has something to say.

 "I don't need... I don't need a partner."

"I don't need...I don't need a friend."

"I need...MAYOR MIKE HAGGAR!"

 "FUNGAAAAAAH!"

 Haggar lays the SMACK down on Rolento! This one's for Cody, you Mad Gear bastard!

 SUPLEX CITY! He suplexed the beanie right off that guy's head!

 Spinning clothesline! MAYOR MIKE SMASH!

 Here's Abigail, the toughest...something.

 "right in your...your pee-hole."

 ...oh.

 Haggar absolutely pummels Abigail in the groin! For AMERICA!

For stage four, I bust out the third character, Guy. Turns out, he's a bit of a revelation. His quick strikes let him stunlock most foes (which, to be fair, Cody can also do a lot of the time). Haggar is basically the advanced difficulty level of the game since he moves slower.

Guy dishes out flying kicks! Look at that smug thug over there, moments before being wiped out of existence. 

 The next section is a battle on an elevator, which harkens back to the Double Dragon series a bit. This is the single most dangerous non-boss section in the game, because you can get knocked off the platform very easily and burn through your lives. The good news? You can also easily knock foes off the platform to one-shot them.

 The next section is a bar (or as it is probably known in the U.S. version, a milk store).

 Katana, the game's toughest boss, returns for a rematch at the end of stage 4. He offers you water before the fight. What are the odds this was Sake or something in the Japanese version?

Funny thing is, it isn't a trick. He's actually offering you a drink. If you take it your health gets refilled. He's like the Rubicante of Mighty Final Fight.

 Another very difficult brawl follows, and he has a couple of new moves. Starting to get the hang of fighting him, which involves sidestepping his attacks and only hitting him back right after he does them and misses.

 Cody returns for the final stage, which takes place on the Jericho Cruise out in the harbor.

The Jericho Cruise: Sail Away, Maaaan.

 This means rematches with Abigail, and...

 ...Katana? AGAIN? This time he's back as Green Katana. I can't believe they make you fight this guy 3 times in a game that's like 30 minutes long. He can teleport this time. Side-stepping still works.

At last, we find ourselves face to succulent kneecaps with Jessica and her vile captor.

...I'm starting to see how she inspires the entire city.

 The bad guy is half-cyborg. He's actually easier than most of the other bosses. It's worth noting that I'm only level 4 of 6 after all of this. Switching characters resets your exp towards the next level, so if I'd stuck with one character the entire way I'd have reached level 6 by now.

 He actually has two forms, sort of. Deplete his first life bar and he gets another one, with new gun-arm abilities.

 Once he goes into arm-volleying mode, the fight is pretty much over. It's just tedious here since you have to chase him around to land hits. A turbo controller is a huge help here, and in general in this game, since it lets you machine-gun punches with Cody or Guy.

 After Cody defeats the 'borg, Mayor Mike knocks him out of the way and runs in to rescue his hot daughter Jessica.

Seriously.

Ay yai yai. Can I play as HER in one of these games?

 We then get one of the weirdest endings I've ever seen, as Haggar holds this grown woman in the air while they watch a sunset.

 "Dad, you can put me down, we've been like this for ten minutes."

Haggar totally takes credit for rescuing her and downplays that Cody was any help.

 Nearby, Cody wants to see his girlfriend and Guy drags him away, saying to let Haggar have his moment. WHAT IS GOING ON?

So...Haggar and Jessica lived happily ever after, I guess.

Wat