Saturday, September 24, 2016

Pokemon: Generation II (Part 4 - Chuck, Jasmine, Pryce)

Today on Pokemon Crystal: Rad-to-the-max Surfer Nero. After a relatively quiet Part 3, the game now launches gym leaders at Nero with the kind of frequency that women throw their undergarments at me when I'm parked at a stoplight with the top down on my swank convertible pimp-mobile. Let's do this.

Thursday, September 22, 2016

Pokemon: Generation II (Part 3 - Morty)

With this many lovely ladies around, I challenge you fellas out there to not get a boner while playing Pokemon Crystal.

Saturday, September 17, 2016

Abzu (Playstation 4, 2016)

Today I'm looking at what is essentially the sequel to Journey after some global warming and a Skynet takeover. While it wasn't produced by the same company, the same group of people worked on this game as Journey and it shows. This is more or less a spiritual sequel, and it's obvious enough that a lot of fans call it "Journey 2".

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Journey (Playstation 3, 2012)

Now out on PS4 is the latest brainchild of the folks that brought you Flower and Fl0w. Compared to my usual posts, this one won't be full of jokes. I've been wanting to do a short review of this game for a while, but instead I'm posting a full playthrough and putting review elements into it. I did this post a while ago, then updated it with pristine PS4 shots, and now I'm reposting it one more time in preparation for Abzu. Without further ado, I give you Journey.

Sunday, September 11, 2016

Game Review: Flower (Playstation 3, 2009)

Publisher: Sony Computer Entertainment

Developer: thatgamecompany

Time to Complete: 2-3 hours

Developed exclusively for the Playstation Network, Flower is one of the more interesting games to come down the pike in some time. Upon its debut, it was referred to by some as a "tech demo" for the Playstation 3 hardware. There is certainly more to it than that. Purchasable for a mere $10, Flower is a sublime experience that anyone can enjoy, whether they're a gamer or not.

Saturday, September 10, 2016

Game Review: Fl0w (Playstation 3, 2007)

Publisher: Sony Computer Entertainment

Developer: thatgamecompany

Time to Complete: 1-2 hours

Thatgamecompany, future makers of Flower and Journey, got their mainstream start with the relatively unassuming Fl0w. It started as a moderately popular flash game before being ported to the PS3 with HD graphics. Riding a wave of momentum, it became the most downloaded PSN game of 2007.

I didn't play this game until well after the spiritual sequel, Flower. That game blew me away. I was so impressed with it that I had to go back and experience the game that it originated from. I wasn't disappointed. I do wonder why it has a zero in the title instead of an o, and the game isn't without problems. It's still pretty rad, though.

Wednesday, September 7, 2016

My Top Ten Favorite Movies

Just what it says on the tin. Today I'll be counting down my personal top ten favorite movies of all time. This list is entirely subjective and by no means am I saying that these are the ten best movies I've ever seen from a design standpoint; The Godfather and Citizen Kane unfortunately won't be making the list. These are simply the ten that I've liked the most over the years and find myself revisiting the most often. I will say that everything on this list is quite good and well worth seeing.

Friday, September 2, 2016

Pokemon: Generation II (Part 2 - Bugsy and Whitney)

 "Psst. Hey, buddy. Want to see the REAL hardcore shit? Pokemon Yellow was nothing. Pokemon Crystal is extreme."

Thursday, September 1, 2016

Pokemon: Generation II (Part 1 - Falkner)

Now I begin the first of the two generations that I missed entirely. I was so close to getting this (well, the Gold or Silver version) back in 2000, but I simply didn't have room among all the amazing PSX RPGs we were getting at the time. 2000 was a time of wonderment: We still had a decent president... the economy was good... "The Real Slim Shady" was playing nonstop on MTV... MTV played music...

Tuesday, August 30, 2016

Nintendo Power, Volume 5 (March/April 1989)

For a long time this was the earliest issue of Nintendo Power that I owned. I had to take a look at this one too just to show how different the magazine was in the first year. What a cover, huh? The early covers can be really colorful.

Monday, August 29, 2016

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles IV: Turtles in Time (Super NES, 1992)

Time for the best Turtles game. This one is timeless, and people still play it today. We never got a Turtles V, and it's just as well, because you can't beat this.

Sunday, August 28, 2016

Portable TMNT Games

Time to look at a few of the non-console entries. Come on in, there will be Punch and Pie. ...well, Punch. All the Pie already went to The Rock.

Playing Fall of the Foot Clan means a lot to me because I never got to check this out as a kid. It's one of the games I considered getting when I first got a Game Boy (my first system, mind you). Luckily I went with Kirby's Dream Land and, even more importantly, Metroid 2, but I have to say this game wouldn't have been a horrible choice either.

Saturday, August 27, 2016

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III: The Manhattan Project (NES, 1992)

Luckily, this one has nothing at all to do with the third Turtles movie. As far as I know, that awful piece of dreck never actually got a video game adaptation. The zero fans clamoring to battle the weird 15th century villains we've never seen before must have been disappointed.

Friday, August 26, 2016

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Arcade Game (NES, 1990)

Now this is more like it. A straight beat-em-up that is more fun to play in EVERY regard than the first game. Now that I've found an NES Turtles game that isn't sheer torture, I took way more screenshots than I probably should have. Let's get to it.

Wednesday, August 24, 2016

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (NES, 1989)

In 1989, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was approximately the coolest IP in the WORLD. I, and just about everyone I knew, watched the cartoon. We collected the action figures. We even ate the breakfast cereal, which had Turtle-shaped marshmallows. Everything Turtle-related was amazing. Everything, that is, except for the NES game.

Originally posted a couple years ago, now updated with the second half of the game

Monday, August 22, 2016

Pokemon: Generation I (Part 7 - Elite Four)

It's time to defeat the Elite Four and become Pokemon League champion! Just as soon as my prized Takeapi evolves into Takeapu.

Saturday, August 20, 2016

Pokemon: Generation I (Part 6 - Blaine and Giovanni)

We rejoin Pokemon Yellow as our heroes arrive on some islands. Will there be Pitbull music playing and ethnically-ambiguous women in bikinis dancing? Once again, no.

Friday, August 19, 2016

Five Game-Related Things I'd Like To See In My Lifetime (2016 Update)

ORIGINALLY POSTED AUGUST 2010. New comments will be in bold.

I'll say it right now: I'm tired of all the ports and remasters in the game industry currently. I enjoy creativity and new worlds to explore, but remasters are way too prevalent. If I want to play a game that already exists, I'll go back and play it in its original form. Enough people are willing to shell out all their money for remakes that the game industry will keep going with this trend, though.

In other words, you won't see any remakes on this list.

...or will you?

2016 Note: It's funny that I said that because this post itself is a re-release.

Thursday, August 18, 2016

Five Movie-Related Things I'd Like To See In My Lifetime (2016 Update)

ORIGINALLY POSTED 2010. New comments will be in bold.

This list will be quick and to-the-point. This is a list of pipe dreams that may or may not come to pass, but they're at the top of my wish list.

2016 Note: Looks like I'm faring a lot better on THIS wish list than the Game-Related Things list...

Wednesday, August 17, 2016

Pokemon: Generation I (Part 5 - Sabrina and Koga)

We rejoin Pokemon Yellow in progress as Ambrose takes a break from DDTing random passerby to take on the Team Rocket boss and free the good people of Silph Corporation from their vile clutches. Also starring not one, but TWO gym leaders...and one future gym's going to be a mad house.